Stole jokes

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were out on a hike. They had been going all day, so they decided to make camp and stay for the night. They both woke up at 3 A.M.

Holmes said, "Look up, Watson, what can you see?"

"Judging from the position of the stars, it looks like it's about 3 A.M."

"What else, Watson?"

"It looks like it will be a beautiful day tomorrow."

"What Else, Watson?"

"What am I supposed to see, Holmes?"

"Elementary my dear Watson, someone stole our tent!"

Why does Sally hate herself? Because Sophie stole her boy.

Someone stole my toilet, and the police have nothing to go on.

When I was little, I would pray to Jesus every night for him to get me a new bike. I learned one week in Sunday school that that's not how it works, so instead I just stole one and asked him for forgiveness.

My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair.

But I knew she'd come crawling back to me.

My boyfriend came over today and stole my milk. How dairy!

To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office: I will find you... You have my Word.

To the guy in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket... You can hide, but you can't run.