SOS jokes

A bully told an orphan to cry to his parents, so he did.

His adoptive parents were very supportive about the situation, and everything was settled. He died in an accident a day later.

*Coughs roughly* Oh my God, it hurts so much. I can't see. It burns! Help!!! Help!!! Help!!! Help!!! *Weakly*

Why are Chinese so good at jaywalking? Cause they can't tell the difference between green and red light with their tiny eyes.

Why does Michael Jackson wear a white glove?

So he won't bite his fingers when he eats a tootsie roll.

A man robs a bank and asks a woman, "Did you see that?"

She says, "Yes." So the man shoots her.

He leaves the bank and sees a couple. He asks, "Did you see that?" The husband said, "No, but my wife did!"

Yo mama so dumb, she thought "The Squid Game" was an all-you-can-eat buffet.

My doctor gave me one year to live, so I shot him. The judge gave me 15. Problem solved!

Why do emo kids love dressing up on Halloween so much?

It's their last holiday for them, but at least they're still hanging on...

My friend told me to make more friends, so I joined a suicide cult.

I’ll be hanging with them for a while.

Me: Mom, can I have some makeup?

Mom: No. You are beautiful just the way you are.

Me: So that’s why you wear makeup?

So I went to a church and I asked a friend, "Is the picture on the wall Jesus, and does it have three nails or one nail?" Oh wait, that's not Jesus, he is not doing the T pose that he invited.