What kind of veggie is always getting itself into a hard situation?
A pickle.
What’s the difference between dark humor and morbid humor?
Dark humor is ten kids in one container; morbid humor is one kid in ten containers.
Murueurx.
Yo mamma so stupid, she starved to death in a grocery store.
Did you hear about the kidnapping? Yeah, he woke up.
What's worse than ten babies on one tree? One baby on ten trees.
This is the true worst joke ever:
What did the person say to the other guy when he met him?
Hi!
Little Johnny was sitting in class, and he was behind a girl called Sally. The teacher asks the class, "Who created the Earth?" And Little Johnny pokes Sally in the back with his sharpened pencil, and she jumps and says, "MY GOD!" And the teacher says, "Yes, Sally, God did create the Earth." Sally sits down.
Then, the teacher asks, "Where do you go after you live a good life?" and Little Johnny pokes Sally again, and she jumps up and says, "HEAVENS TO BETSY!" And the teacher says, "Yes Sally. You will go to heaven after you live a good life." Sally sits down, knowing full well Little Johnny was poking her. Sally gave Little Johnny an angry glare, and she turns around.
And then, the teacher asks the class, "What did Eve say to Adam after their 77th child?" and Little Johnny pokes Sally HARDER this time in the back, and Sally jumps, turns around and says, "If you stick that thing in me one more time, I swear I'm gonna lose it!" And the teacher faints.
A man walked into a bar...
Ouch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
How do you find a blind man at a nude beach?
It isn't hard.
one day I went skating and skated for so long that my feet were incredibly sore. It was like my skates were moving all by themselves but I decided to just roll with the situation
Friend 1: I don't want to jump.
Friend 2: Me neither.
Murderer: If you don't jump, I'll stab you.
Friend 1: *jumps*
Friend 2: *jumps*
Murderer: I didn't mean off the building!
Friend 1: I know that. I just pretended to jump to get rid of that guy.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
You.
You who?
Don't you get it? You're the joke, dumbass!
What do you call a man that has no arms, no legs, and sits in front of your door? Mat.
Why can't an orphan play Family Feud? Because it has to have a family.
My favorite joke is my life.
There was a woman, with me, sitting. I had to leave until she pointed at something, it was, my butt. I was confused until, it was her turn. Of, Truth or Dare.
What's the difference between dark humor and morbid humor? Dark humor would be saying, "ten babies in one trashcan." Morbid humor would be saying, "one baby in ten trashcans."
Who are you?
Oh, I'm an orphan!
Oh... bye! :/
Girl: "Come over."
Orphan: "I can't."
Girl: "My parents aren't home ;)"
Orphan: "Oh cool, something we have in common."
