Seven jokes
"I have a three-head."
"I have a four-head."
Bald people have a seven-head.
What do you call an under-the-weather seven?
A sick seven.
I was sitting on my own in a restaurant when I saw a beautiful woman at another table. I sent her a bottle of the most expensive wine on the menu. She sent me a note, “I will not touch a drop of this wine unless you can assure me that you have seven inches in your pocket.” I wrote back, “Give me the wine. As gorgeous as you are, I'm not cutting off three inches for anyone.”
Ok, so, a mole goes up to a snail and eats him.
It was a seven course meal if I say so myself.
Why is the number 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.
I was reading this in class and laughed at loud, i had to clear all my history of jokes
Person 1: “How many ph vids have you watched today?”
Person 2: “Seven.”
Person 1: “What the fuck, dude.”
Person 2: “I know, right? I’ve gotten seven ads for Pizza Hut in the past hour.”
(Based on an encounter I had recently)
Seven days without a pun makes one weak.
Better call NASA and tell them there are only going to be 7 planets after I destroy URANUS.
I can count the number of times I've been to Chernobyl on one hand. -- It's seven.
If it is called a forehead, what happened to the five-head, six-head, and seven-head?
I asked my wife if I was the only one she slept with. She said yes—the others were 7's and 8's.
When Chuck Norris breaks a mirror, the mirror gets seven years of bad luck.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 9.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Seven’s been worried about six even since he left Afghanistan. Every time 6 closes his eyes, he sees the war and hears the gunshots. He sees the blood, the killing, the death, and soldiers falling. When he looks at seven, he remembers when they were forced to eat their own flesh to not starve in those caves. He sees the war and the flashbacks will come back forever, burned into his soul and mind.
Joke: "7 8 9" (seven eight nine), why is 8 (eight) scared of 7 (seven)?
Answer: This is because; in "7 8 9", 8 is pronounced as (ate). So because seven ate nine, eight is scared that seven would eat eight also.
Why did 7 kill 11?
Because now 7 was even.
The FitnessGramTM Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20-meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.
Level 1 Feel it One Two Three Four Five Six Seven; end of level one.
Why did 6 hate 7?
Because 7 ate 9!
"This isn't the first time my husband's cheated on me, but you're my sister! You'd better have a better explanation than this magic lamp."
"You know how you have to be specific making wishes? Well, I was really horny and asked the genie to have the world's biggest penis....ended up with a concert pianist that's seven foot tall. Nice guy. Next time I tried, I asked for the world's biggest cock, that was fun but the poor rooster died. So I asked for the world's biggest dick and that's how I ended up on top of your husband."
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 broke into a daycare and ate 12 children before burning the building down.