Motivational quote for today: if you think you're dumb, you're probably overestimating your intellectual abilities...
I told myself I needed to stop drinking so much. But I'm not about to start listening to some drunk weirdo who talks to themself.
I asked God why nobody likes me. He showed a reflection of myself.
How to tell if you're depressed? You came to a website called "worst jokes ever.com" looking for a quick smile.
Who am I?
I asked my friend if they will show me something retarded. He said, "Go look in a mirror." I said, "Thank you."
My friend: You really need to stop the SH jokes.
Me: But they're not that long.
My Friend Evan: What happens if the voice inside your head is your soulmate?
Me: Then my soulmate is a F_cking A__hole.
Kid: What is the biggest mistake you made in your life?
Parents: Go look above the bathroom sink.
Kid goes and looks, but then he realizes.
POV: 11:07 PM At night, reading these when you notice that, like everyone else, you have no life.
Sometimes my battery life has the same recognition as me :(
If you're depressed and you're crying, like this joke.
Me: I know why you don't have friends.
Kid: Why?
Me: Because you can't even figure that out.
Your mom said I was ugly. I told her she couldn’t see her belly button because she was so fat. She said, “I thought I was the only one without one!”
The best joke in the world is me.
Don't say that you're not a joke. Jokes have meanings.
I tend to think my ‘depression’ is for attention. I guess I have depressed depression.
There was always that one specific person you thought ruined your life, but it turns out your life has always been ruined by you being in it.
Thankfully, I'm still alive because I fail at everything in life.
Me: Knock knock.
Friend: Who's there?
Me: I don't know anymore.
I have OCD and ADD, so everything has to be perfect... but not for very long.