Salad jokes
The reason why I stopped eating salads was not to be unhealthy; it was so I don't need to eat the wheelchairs along with all those fucking vegetables.
What is a group of disabled people in a coma called?
A salad.
What did the salad say to pineapple?
"Lettuce be friends."
What do you do with epileptic lettuce? -- You make a seizure salad.
Why did the tomato blush? -- Because it saw the salad dressing.
What's the difference between a baby and a salad?
Most people don't get angry when you toss a salad.