I walked up to a group of moms having a conversation while waiting to pick up their kids from day care. They were using cutesy words like 'ankle biters', 'rug rats' and other terms I've heard parents use before when describing their toddlers.
I thought I'd chime in; as it turns out, 'carpet muncher' doesn't mean what I thought it does.
A guy asks a girl to go to a dance. She agrees, and he decides to rent a suit. The rental has a long line, so he waits and waits, and finally he gets his suit.
He decides to buy flowers, so he goes to the flower shop. The flower shop has a long line, so he waits and waits, until he finally buys flowers.
He picks up the girl and they go to the dance. There is a long line into the dance, so they wait and wait.
Finally, they get into the dance, and the guy offers to get the girl a drink. She asks for punch, so he goes to the drink table, and there is no punch line.
What’s the difference between apples and orphans?
Apples get picked!
one day there were these 3 cow boys sitting next to a fire and they were telling each other about their adventures well the first cow boy said i tangled with a bull that killed 6 people so i wrestled that son of a bitch to the ground with my bare hands the second cow boy said that's nothing yesterday i was walking on a trale and came across a rattler so i picked it up ,bit its head off and drank all his venom in one gulp the third cow boy remained quiet stering the embers of the fire with his penis
Why did they make bus stops? So the bus driver would know where to pick the orphan up.
I picked up a document and I started to feel cold. I looked down at the document and it read DRAFT.
You know they lying when they say, my moms, picking me up.
why don't orphans go home at pick up? cuz they don't have parents to pick them up
this ole boy picked up a hooker one time and she gave him the clap and in a few days he saw her again and he went up to her and said hey you gave me the clap and she said NO I DID NOT I sold it to ya
why didn't the orphans stay at the park for days? because they had no one to pick them up. what's a orphans best friend? a boomarange because it's the only thing that ever came back.
What’s the difference between apples and orphans apples actually get picked
I dropped my phone the other day when a guy picked up my phone and started to put it in his pocket. I said, "Hey, that's my phone," and he said, "First of all, my name isn't 'Hey', it's Jay. Second of all, it's an iPhone, not a 'myPhone'. Get it right."
what did the nose say to the finger
stop picking me
Kidnapper: hey kid your parents told me to pick you up Kid: Sir this is an orphanage Kidnapper: ...
what's the difference between an APPLE and an ORPHAN, the APPLE always get picked
A guy told a beautiful girl "hey I want to make love to you if I throw 2000$ when you go to pick it up that's when I'll go is that okay?" She called her husband and he said "okay but pick it up fast so he doesn't have time to pull his pants down" Four hours later she shows up to her house and tell her husband "THAT FUCKER PAID IN COINS"
