Personal finance jokes
Advertisement: "What's in your wallet?"
Me: "The same amount of money as there is my will to live... ;_)"
I’ve got money and suicidal thoughts, and I’m all out of money.
Call me a bad economy with high interest rates and low spending, 'cause I'm in a great depression.
Money and women are kind of the same thing for me; it comes and goes very easily.
Today I donated my watch, phone, and $500 to a poor guy. You wouldn't believe the happiness I felt as he slid the pistol back into his pocket.
Money and my mom are kinda the same thing; they come and leave easily.
My friend, while we are shopping and I'm telling her about my mental illness: "You're priceless."
When we get to the checkout: "I'm actually $2.50."
My bank loves me. They told me my credit card balance is outstanding.
I was very lonely so I bought some shares. -- It's nice to have a bit of company.
