Pedophille jokes

Him: *slowly drives past elementary school while looking at kids*

Her: Why are you staring at those kids? *jokingly* Are you like a pedophile or something?

Him: ... At least you know why I love calling you "baby" now~

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  • A pedophile lures a group of Houston Girl Scouts with "Hey girls, would you like some candy?" They all agree and follow him to his neighborhood. There he offers them some more candy and they follow him to his house. Once again he offers them candy to go in to his house. In the lounge he offers them candy to go to his room. As he leads them up the stairs one of them pipes up and says "God, I hope we get laid before we get diabetes."

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  • My girlfriend broke up with me yesterday. I asked her why. She said, "Because you're a pedophile." I replied, "Pedophile! That's a big word for an eight year old."

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  • What's a pedophile's favorite holiday?

    Halloween. Free delivery!

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  • Two pedophiles are on a beach.

    One says to the other, "Move over, you're in my sun!"

    Two pedophiles meet each other. Then one asks if he wanted to trade "2 of 5" for "1 of 10?"

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  • What’s the difference between a doctor and a pedophile?

    The doctor doesn’t enjoy giving physicals.

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  • Statistics show that 1 in 3 people live next to a pedophile. However, I think that's a lie because I just live next to 2 stunning 8-year-olds.

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  • What is a pedophile's favorite part of a hockey game?

    Before the first period.

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  • Q: What's a pedophile's favorite place to eat?

    A: Schools because there is a wide variety of choices.

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  • All Mia needs to destroy the evil young girl in Resident Evil 7 Biohazard, was using a pedophile instead of serum.

    OK, there are at least 3 pedophiles in your neighborhood.

    But there are no pedophiles in my neighborhood; there are only three 10-year-old girls with juicy asses.

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