Pedophille jokes
I dated a lot of girls before I married my wife. I was living with one of them when I arrived home one day to find her bags packed and next to the door. I asked her, "Baby, what's going on?" She said, "I'm leaving you."
"But why?" I replied.
"Because you're a pedophile!" she answered.
"That's a pretty big word for a six-year-old," I said.
What’s one good thing about pedophiles?
They drive slow in school zones.
What's the difference between Michael Joseph Jackson and Mickey Mouse? Besides being a disease-carrying rodent, and one a dangerous pedophile, Mickey Mouse can still touch and go near kids.
A little boy enters Michael Joseph Jackson's house with a doll, and Michael looks angrily at the boy. But the little boy says something that makes Michael jealous: "The girl is mine." Michael cries and asks the boy to leave. A child is saved, and more are, thanks to Conrad Murray and June 25th, dead pedophile day.
What do you call the heterosexual Michael Joseph Jackson?
Jeffrey Epstein.
Trump's releasing the files.
To catch all the pedophiles.
He didn't know Epstein.
Didn't touch any teens.
My girlfriend called me pedophile today.
Big word for a 12-year-old.
A pedophile and a priest run a race.
You can’t beat yourself in a race!
What is a pedophile's favorite age range?
9-11.
A rapist, pedophile, and a priest walk into a bar.
He orders a beer.
What do Civil War veterans and pedophiles have in common?
They both prefer Minnie (mini) balls.
A rapist, pedophile, and a priest walk into a bar. He orders a beer.
Same person.
What's the hardest part of being a pedophile?
Fitting in.
A pedophile was holding a bag of chocolates and then approached a little girl at the park.
"Hey little girl! If you give me a teeny-tiny kissy-kiss on the tip of my wee-wee, I'll give you a piece of my chocolate!"
The little girl replies, "If I suck your whole cock, can I have the whole bag?"
Did you know that people say Michael Jackson only became a pedophile when he was white?
Lucky for him, if he was black he would have been found guilty.
What’s the hardest part about being a pedophile?
Fitting in.
What does the SpongeBob intro and a pedophile have in common?
"Are you ready kids?"
Two guys in a car get pulled over by a cop. The cop taps the window, and the window rolls down. "Good evening, gentlemen, we're looking for two pedophiles."
The guy quickly closes the window. Ten seconds later, he lowers it again and says, "Ok, we'll do it."
I have a question: Does aging affect corpses, too?
Just asking to know if I still count as a pedophile or not!
Say what you will about pedophiles. At least they drive slowly through school zones.