New Pedophille Jokes - Page 8

Q: Why don't pedophiles win races?

A: Because they like to come in a little behind.

What type of file does it take to turn a 4 mm hole to a 44 mm hole?

A pedophile.

What do you call it when a Mexican and a pedophile fight?

Alien vs Predator.

Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.

Not done yet.

Now they are.

What shoes do pedophiles wear? White vans.

How do pedophiles fit in? They force it to go in.

How do you make a 16 mm hole into a 40 mm hole? A pedophile comes in.

What did Santa say when he was passing over some hookers? "Ho ho ho!"

What's a pedophile's favorite type of shoe?

White Vans.

What are a pedophile"s shoes called?

Answer: WHITE VANS

What's a pedophile's favorite type of garden?

A kindergarden.

What do city plumbers and pedophiles have in common?

They both lay pipes in public parks.

My girlfriend called me a pedophile... That's a big word for a 1st grader.

What do you say to a pedophile at the beach?

Get out of my son!

What is a pedophile's favorite dating site?

Kinder

Pedophile: You dropped your candy.

Girl: Thanks!

Pedophile stares as she slowly bends over to pick up her candy.

Pedophile: It looks a bit dirty, do you wanna come back to my house and get a new one?

Girl: How far is your house?

Pedophile: It's that white one right over there.

Girl: You mean that van next to a dumpster?

Pedophile: Yep, it's that one.

Girl:.... Sure! :P

Audience:.........Dumbass girl.

Pedophiles smell good.

Him: *slowly drives past elementary school while looking at kids*

Her: Why are you staring at those kids? *jokingly* Are you like a pedophile or something?

Him: ... At least you know why I love calling you "baby" now~

My girlfriend called me a pedophile, but what does she know? She's 7.

A pedophile lures a group of Houston Girl Scouts with "Hey girls, would you like some candy?" They all agree and follow him to his neighborhood. There he offers them some more candy and they follow him to his house. Once again he offers them candy to go in to his house. In the lounge he offers them candy to go to his room. As he leads them up the stairs one of them pipes up and says "God, I hope we get laid before we get diabetes."

Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.

My girlfriend broke up with me yesterday. I asked her why. She said, "Because you're a pedophile." I replied, "Pedophile! That's a big word for an eight year old."