Parent jokes

Punch an orphan in the face what they gonna do? Tell there parents

I met a kid at the park. He was holding a picture of his parents in his hands. They had died on 9/11.

So, I went to comfort him. I said, "Hey, I lost my grandpa on 9/11. He was great. At flying a plane."

I tell dad jokes all the time even though I’m not actually a dad.

I’m a faux pa.

I’ll never forget my father’s last words to me just before he died: “Are you sure you fixed the brakes?”

What’s the easiest way for parents to find out if their child is gay Look in the closet

"Mommy, mommy, where's my school dress... ewww!"

"Shut up and leave the bedroom."

My bumper sticker says: "👋FORMER BABY ON BOARD."

How are you and an orphan similar?

Both of your fathers are invisible.

The twin towers are like your father, they're both gone and will never come back.

What’s the worst joke ever? Your parents’ relationship.

When I was at work, I saw this kid crying. I said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working in an orphanage.

I think people should date orphans, because their parents are never home.

Two boys were at a lake, and they went to a bush and saw a naked lady.

One ran away, the other one followed the one who ran and asked why he ran. The boy answered, "My mum told me if I saw a naked lady I would turn to stone. I ran away because I felt something get hard."

Mom asks, "Why are you are THIS show??? It's DISTRACTING you from SCHOOL!!!!!"

The child says, "Don't you mean SCHOOL is distracting ME from this AWESOME show?"

Mom whispers, "Oh, you DEAD."

Why are orphans so bad at dodgeball?

Because nobody misses them.

What is old, cold, and alone?

An orphan's parents.

A girl came to my house. She said, "Where are your parents?" I started crying.

Why did the orphan cross the road? (Not to see his mom or dad.)

What is an orphan's most hated baseball team? The Padres.

Your hairline went back faster than your adoption papers!