Parent Jokes

Everyone makes mistakes. Like my mom, she made a mistake 13 years ago

Everyone makes mistakes. Just ask your parents.

Orphan: I finally have a father! God: And who is that? Orphan: You! God: Who the hell is you? Well, it's not me. Orphan: :l

Q: Why don't Orphans turn up to parents evening?

A: Because they dont have any parents

Hey Evan this is dad ya I’m still not home

How do parents punish their blind kids?

They re-arrange the furniture

Little Jonny walks in on his parents having sex. He asks what their doing and the father says: "Well...We're making you a brother." So little Jonny runs off to let his parents finish, happy that he's going to have a brother soon. The next day when little Jonny's father comes come Jonny is crying out on the driveway. The father sits down next to Jonny and asks what's wrong. Jonny cries: "I won't have a baby brother!" HIs father is confused. "What do you mean?" He asks. "Because the mailman came by today and ate him!"

What’s the difference between an apple and a orphan?

An apple gets picked

my mum found a chest that was wet and it had a child in it she asked me what it was for i said i put kids in it and chuck it in a river until they are ded

what the difference between a cheater and your mom:they both cheated

What do orphans do at parent teacher meetings?

This kinda reminds me of when my mum was feeding me. She always used to say open wide for the delicious plane.

My Mom said: I have a daughter that killed herself for getting bullied. Well i said: Have you seen her?

Mom: son where is my condoms son: what are condoms DAD: she puts it on me and the sandwich son: wait why did my girlfriend come over and take one dad: um I don't know but go to bed son: but it's 2:46pm in the afternoon bruh

teacher: students, tomorrow bring your parents to the open house. student one orphan: I don't have any. student 2: what is the difference between you and an escaped prisoner. student one orphan: what! student 2: the prisoner gets picked.

why are orphan so scared of the dark the dad cant check the closet for them.

i bet when your mom first saw you she said oh my god this aint my child my child would look amazing

An orphan was in 1st grade and it's teacher said to spell parrot. The boy spelled Parents.

today i saw my son lick out a tub of butter, i told him to make a sandwitch without butter for a week (as a punishment) he said 'ok' and licked the bread. 'it's really easy to spread' he said. LOL!