I was walking with my black best friend and he was meeting my parents and after I got there they said who’s this? I said well I own him
My bro’s parents died but he didn’t know why.
Turns out they died because he was a failure and he would be going to an orphanage in 4 days
One time I broke a leg and I was using a wheelchair
My parents thought I was a disappointment and put me up on EBay, The Ohioan Black Market, and the nearest adoption center.
btw friend here also wants to do suicide
friend:why did i cross the road??? me:to get to the other side. friend:true!
friend:hey lets go hang out at the forest today! me:ok *grabs ropes for the both of us and rushes outside bc this is a lucky day* friend:hey atleast we did it!
friend:whats the best thing about me? me:you will eventually end. friend:hmmmmmm . . . true!
friend:what historical time influenced you the most? me:the great depression
if i could be an object id be glass because im see through and i can shatter with the minimum difficulty immediately!
my parents sometimes say im their sunshine! . . . because im painful if you look at me.
teacher:what does km/s mean? me+like almost all of the class:*in unison* it means kill myself but misspelled
friend:whats the best way to end a game? me:with death friend: . . . hmmm now that you think about it yeah! thats the best way!
when your about to jump down a cliff but you realize that you cant litter there
google says that your about 75% water but im make of 101% depression 101% anxiety 101% suicidal 101% stress
brain be like will_to_live.exe, happiness.exe, and many more others not found also you have now got crippling_depression.exe, anxiety.exe, suicide_thoughts.exe, suicide_attempts, and stressful_life.exe so so so much many more
how do you keep weeds away? just put a bucket of crippling depression and suicidal thought and attempts in the soil and then they just kill themselves. problem solved.
when you take antidepressants but they dont work it will just make you more depressed and thats a fact
a bored depressed suicidal person:*sees a dying person* dying person:p-l-pls c-c-c-call m-me a-an amb-b-bulancccee *wheeze* *dies* bored depressed suicidal person:hmmmm ur an ambulance dying person:*manages to get back up* bored depressed suicidal person:oooooohh goddddd dying person:*in a demonic tone* BUT NOT FOR ME~
roses are red inside im dead i have crippling depression some one pls shoot my head
when you finally open up to a person who you think will care and understand but it turns out that they dont you:*panickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanickingpanicking*
the only time you should lift your spirits up is when your gonna hang yourself
a made up story starting now so i went to school as usual theres a school shooting all the depressed suicidal people:*crave death* *walks up to shooter* all say KILL ME a made up story starting ending
in this one the friend isnt suicidal friend:wanna play a game? me:life wait no a game has a meaning friend: . . . *crickets* friend:calls suicide hotline me:wait no!!!!!
me:*has crippling depression* *asks mom why i was born* mom:hmmm i think i was drunk and on a lotta drugs me:hmmm tysm *gets the rope* mom:*making hanging puns* me:*hurries to the trash truck*
me:at this point ive lived about a decade depressed and suicidal that i dont struggle with it now, im good at it and its all normal
hope you enjoyed
my friend lives in a caravan park his parents named him money because they thought it was a type of currency
I hate it when a couple has a minor quarrel, and the girlfriend updates her Facebook status to ‘single.’ I mean, I fight with my parents all the time, but I never update my status to ‘orphan.’
Why did the orphan sit alone in the corner? They wanted some family time.
i shouted at a kid I told him to get his parents
it was the last time I worked at an orphanage ,🤣
What’s the worst joke ever, your parent’s relationship.
Why does a orphanage have any milk because dad never came back with the milk
Parents.......
One day at school I made fun of a girl who lost her hair from cancer, and my parents made me shave my head.
The next day at school I made fun of an orphan.
egg shaped, dome, bowling ball lookin ass, bald fuck with that 360 degrees ahh head, mf look like a damn balloon. call me kobe cause im finna use your head as a basketball and throw it at yo parents. mr clean, bootleg saitama lookin ass mfer. no hair? :(
God: you're gonna have 2 parents.
Orphan: douvle it and give it to the next person
The way u are so ugly ur parents even regret the day u were born
The way u are so black when ur mom is bathing u in the dark she has to put flour in the water to see u 🤣🤣🤣
your hairline goes even further back than the last time your parents said i love you
The twin towers are like your father, their both gone and will never come back.
What is the day parents stooped fearing for their little boys? June 25, dead pedo day.
Guess whos parents didn't survive?
Livs's parents
Why do orphans that go to there friends house friends mom:go back to your house it’s late Finn wait can I have your moms phone number Finn friends mom: wait aren’t you a orfinn wait don’t you have a phone Finn? wait I forgot you don’t have a phone because nobody wanted to get you a phone or to get you
