Worst Jokes Ever

What’s another name for nutting in a woman?

Loading the dishwasher.

Don't you feel an empty feeling...

IN YOUR SKULL!

Why is the graveyard so noisy?

Because of all the coffin : )

If you're fat and transgender, then would you be considered trans fat?

Dnebdoctor?

Realger.

Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating?

Because they have no body to go with.

A blind woman tells her boyfriend that she’s seeing someone. It’s either terrible news or great news.

"What’s your name, son?" the principal asked his student. The kid replied, “D-d-d-dav-dav-david, sir.” "Do you have a stutter?" the principal asked. The student answered, “No sir, my dad has a stutter but the guy who registered my name was a real jerk.”

Patient: Oh, doctor, I’m just so nervous. This is my first operation.

Doctor: Don’t worry. Mine too.

I was playing chess with my friend and he said, "Let’s make this interesting."

So we stopped playing chess.

The most corrupt CEOs are those of the pretzel companies.

They’re always so twisted!

You're not completely useless. You can always be used as a bad example.

Wait, 911 is the American emergency number...

You’re so ugly, I can see why your dad left now.

Your mum, your dad, The things you never had.

Why are gay men so rude? Because they're fucking assholes.

What do you call it when you're dead because of that one drink in Panera Bread? Panera dead.

I saw a black man riding a brand new bike, so I went home to check my garage. It’s all good because I still saw mine still chained to the floor begging for food.

I was going to think of a good amputee joke...

But I’m stumped.