Mr

Mr Jokes

A kindergarten teacher was telling a story...

A kindergarten teacher was telling a story about a farmer walking around the farm talking to the animals. She was trying to get the kids to interact, speak up, and to use their imaginations.

"Mister Farmer stopped at the cow, and the cow said 'Morning, Mister Farmer!'. Susie, what do you thing the farmer said next?"

Susie says "He said 'Good morning Mrs. Cow!'"

"Mister Farmer stopped at the pig next, and the pig said 'Good morning, Mister Farmer!'. Johnny, what do you thing the farmer said next?" Johnny says "He said 'Good morning Mr. Pig!'"

"Mister Farmer stopped at the chicken, and the Chicken said 'Morning, Mister Farmer!'. Billy, what do you thing the farmer said next?" Billy says "The farmer said 'Holy shit, that chicken is fucking talking!'"

Vegan teacher the musical Miss Kadie - oh no you poor dead animal Mr. Beast- ๐ŸŽถ your a dumb Communist Miss Kadie๐ŸŽถ Chandler-๐ŸŽต yup your one high fluting son of a gun๐ŸŽต Mr. Beast- ๐ŸŽต I just gobbled up a quadruple patty from my restaurant๐ŸŽต Miss Kadie - ๐ŸŽต donโ€™t hurt animals kids, do you want to be a vegans R us kid๐ŸŽต kids- ๐ŸŽต weโ€™ve had enough of your problems miss Kadie your such a commie Miss Kadie - ๐ŸŽต I just want to die because Iโ€™m so sad - Miss Kadie jumps off Mr. Beast Burger and comits sucide

Rachel won the lottery twice in two years. Her friend Jim called her every day asking for tips on winning just the same. Then one day, simply to get rid of him Rachel said. Watch two martial arts movies , eat three pieces of hard beef jerky, and pick a fight at a bar. Jim replied with a shocked look, that's what I do after Mr tugman shakes my hand to long.

Mrs. Kadie- I heard about this Mr. Beast Video about Veggie Burgers. I hope that you didn't trick me again Mr., Beast- Today we're gonna be eating a Hot tender Burger Mrs. Kadie- OMG he didn't say vegan Viewers- HAHAHA WE TRICKED YOU Mrs. Kadie- That's it Mr. Beast we're gonna pour Blood on your face Mr. Beast& Chandler- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!1!

*New teacher walks in* New Teacher : hi there class my name is Mr. willy i will be yo math teacher *Me in shock Willy* Me : Willy Wonka is that you?!

Celebrate-By- watersharky Productions and Pitbull- Mr. Worldwide Let's celebrate I just wanna celebrate I just wanna celebrate Tonight we're making history I just wanna celebrate We've been around the world, same song Work hard, play hard, all day long All the continents get jealous over me You can see me 3D overseas If you know me then you know where to find me Off in the Bahamas with a bad one behind me Now live it up, live it up, live it up Baby pick it up, pick it up, pick it up And we gon' Boom boom around the world Boom boom no kidding girl Boom boom that's the way we like to play We gon' Boom boom around the world Boom boom no kidding girl Boom boom that's the way we like to play I just wanna celebrate I just wanna celebrate Tonight we're making history I just wanna celebrate Turn it up Turn it up I've been patiently waiting for you to shake and shake it Make it or take it The point is we made it Courted by the game, call us Tom Brady And it's not our fault that we have all the ladies But it's hard to see these ladies when your middle name's Equator All around the globe, matter fact see your later They're great, we're great at world war, dominators And we're also some smooth operators, and we gon' Boom boom around the world Boom boom no kidding girl Boom boom That's the way we like to play We gon' Boom boom around the world Boom boom no kidding girl Boom boom that's the way we like to play I just wanna celebrate I just wanna celebrate Tonight we're making history I just wanna celebrate Turn it up Turn it up Live it up (Live it up), don't let life live you (Live you) It's a good time (Good time), so we give you (Give you) Now live it up, live it up, live it up, live it up, live it up What you wanna do? I just wanna celebrate I just wanna celebrate Tonight we're making history I just wanna celebrate Turn it up Let's celebrate Turn it up Let's celebrate

A kid and a man is walking into a forest at night, Kid "Mr, its getting dark, I'm scared!" Man "How do you think I feel, I have to walk back alone"

Neona (๐Ÿ˜Ÿ): Gwen?

Gwen (๐Ÿ™): Yes ... what can I do for you?

Neona (๐Ÿ˜”) : You were so right! Mr. Smith has sexual problems and is a fool! I am so sorry that you were not a lier! PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!!!!

Gwen (๐Ÿ˜’): You should have listend. Plus I'm over it!

Neona (๐Ÿ˜ž): Are you mad at me?

Gwen (๐Ÿ˜Œ): Me? NEVER! Sometimes we listen and don't listen,

Neona (๐Ÿ˜ƒ): Gwen! I got the job!!!!!!!!!

Gwen (๐Ÿ˜): I knew it !! I knew my prayer worked!

Neona (๐Ÿ˜): He said that all my ideas are the best and that I start on Monday!

Gwen (๐Ÿ˜): Man, don't you love Mr. Jaekson? He is the best person the company has ever had!

Neona (๐Ÿ™): Who is Mr. Jaekson?

Gwen (๐Ÿ˜•): Wait ... Mr. Jaekson didn't interview you?

Neona (๐Ÿ˜•): No! Mr. Smith did. He said he was standing.

Gwen (๐Ÿ˜ฏ): No, Mr. Smith, you are a fool who never lets you spread the word or do anything. I can also mention that he is a person who has sexual problems!

Neona(๐Ÿคจ,๐Ÿ™,๐Ÿ˜ ): Gwen, you are a liar!

Gwen (๐Ÿ˜Ÿ): No, I'm not. I'm telling the truth Neona!

Neona (๐Ÿ˜”): Gwen please be happy that I got the job without you lying that Mr.Smith sexual hassults women!!!

Gwen (๐Ÿ™): He does your not listing.

Neona (๐Ÿคฌ): I don't care BITCH!!!!

Mr. Smith: Neona, tell us what you have for the biggest competition that we can do to keep our competitors out of the winning streak.

Neona: Will thought we used more sales and more advertising.

Mr. Smith: It's already a good idea. Now what about the business plan? We need it as recommendations to keep the business going. Tell me, what do you have in mine?

Neona: It is better to always have a plan. I was thinking that we can get higher prices and always get great deals, the people will go nuts for a great deal!

Mr. Smith: Perfect. Now let's take a 5 minute break.

Mr. Smith: Ok, 5 minutes is up!

Now Neona, I know you are an intern, but what are the best things we can do for the company?

Neona: Hmm...lets see...will we can start with all the things people love! If this is going to work then we have have to......

Mr.Smith lived in an apartment. in the apartment, he went to the elevator and went to the 16th floor then he went to the 21st floor by 5 stairs every morning. why did he do that?

because he was too short!! so he pressed the highest button he could and went to his apartment