my stepdad has stage 4 cancer and is going through chemo therapy... atleast he saves money on shampoo and conditioner.
Why is trump always in debt, his university isn't paid off yet!
ROBERT LEWANDISNEY SONG
Give me freedom Give me fire Give me contract Or I retire
Jog all day Out of UCL now FC Barcelona I need you now
Villarreal defenders They surround me Big submarines All around me
I get upset Call my agent I want money I’m impatient
What can a gay man can't be but a heterosexual female that is a whore can be if a heterosexual male gives her enough of money? 💸 cock teaser
How can a gay man that is unemployed be productive in the workplace? give a blowjob to other gay men in the workplace for money.
A man robs a bank and asks a woman, "did you see that?" She says "yes", so the man shoots her. He leaves the bank and sees a couple, he asks "did you see that?" "No but my wife did!" The husband said.
Why do emo people go to the store with no money? Because they Just scan their bar code and get every thing free.
One day it was me & my sister in the house. My sister said to me let's order food I said we have no money. My sister said it's cool were just going to order egg rolls from the Chinese store I know the delivery boy & he won't charge us. I said cool. The delivery boy came with the egg rolls. I took some & ate mines in my room. I went back in the kitchen I see my sister giving the delivery boy a blow job I ask what are you doing. My sister replied back to me & you had your egg rolls let me enjoy mine. Then the delivery boy said don't no charge.
What do a family dollar and a orphan they have a f in it for family
what stands on the side of the road and needs a lot of money to buy
billboard, did you think I was gonna say street walker?
a kid was asking a mother for money
mother: sorry I don't have money
the kid kept asking the mother for money
mother: I already told you I don't have money
the kid(the middle child): I'm your fucking child
Why did the orphan play Monopoly to at least get some money #fake
What makes a raccoon 🦝 very rich?
Its rings!
Hey any riding with biden fans out their? I ran out of gas and could really use a ride so of one of ya'll can call me and pick me up that be great and I can't get gas because I only have 20 bucks which is like 1-5 an a half help me please
So Little Johnny's teacher is warned at the beginning of the school year not to ever make a bet with Johnny unless she is absolutely sure she will win it. One day in class, Johnny raises his hand and says "teacher, I'll bet you $50 I can guess what color your underwear is." She replies, "okay, meet me after class and we'll settle it." But beforeclass ends, she goes to the restroom and removes her panties. After class is over and the studentsclear out, Johnny makes his guess. "Blue." "Nope. You got it wrong," she says as she lifts her skirt to reveal she isn't wearing any underwear. "Well come with me out to my dads car, he's waiting for me, and I'll get you the money." She follows him out. When they get to the car she informs his dad that he got the bet wrong and that she showed Johnny that she wasn't wearing any underwear. His dad exclaims: "That mother fucker! He bet me $100 this morning that he'd see your pussy before the end of the day!"
A guy walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says: If i can suprise you, i get a free drink. The bartender was unsure but agreed. The guy pulled up a 30cm long pianist out of his pocket and he starts to play The bartender was suprised and gave the guy a free drink The guy then sais: You see, i have a little wizard in my pocket that grants wishes, can i get another free drink if you get a free wish? The bartender agrees without hesitation The bartender wishes for a 1000 bucks, but he gets a 1000 ducks WTF! the man shouts. The guy answered: Did you think i wanted a 30cm long pianist
I was walking to the store and then this boy told me "I'm an orphan and I have no money" he wanted M&Ms I gave him Family sized
My wife got mad at me because I took our life savings and brought golden retrievers.
Like bitch we can get gold because of these golden retrievers.
I was on a bus when this girl offered to blow me for $5...
...and never being a person to pass up a good deal, I gave her $5 and watched her do her thing. After she was finished she lit up a cigarette and started smoking right there on the bus.
I was disgusted. I thought to myself, "What is this world coming to? Who sells cigarettes to a 12 year old?"
was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner. I took out my wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked,"If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.
"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" I asked.
"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said.."I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."
"Will you spend this on hunting equipment?" I asked.
"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't gone hunting in 20 years!"
"Well," I said, "I'm not going to give you money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a shower and a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that?
I replied, "Don't worry about that. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up drinking, fishing and hunting."
Not a joke but still dc
