Worst Jokes Ever

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shaylie lol

The image is a side-by-side comparison of two people making exaggerated, mocking faces. On the left, a woman with her eyes squinted and mouth open, expressing disgust. On the right, a young boy with a scrunched-up face and a mocking grin. The text above the images reads: "When y'all stop arguing and just start mocking each other...."

Anonymous

Shitpost-master general

A cat sleeps in a bed with the text "the grind NEVER starts. I am sleeping."

Heroin Monkey

Heroin Monkey

grandegarlic
bogleech
werewarg
onlylolgifs
Polymer balls that are invisible in water
IMAGINE PUTTING LIKE 10 IN SOMEONE'S BATH AND THEY
GET IN THEY JUST START FREAKING OUT BECAUSE
THERES SOMETHING TOUCHING ME BUT THERES NOTHING
IN THE FUCKING WATER WHAT THE FUCK OMFG
you're not thinking big enough
make them in the shape of people with huge long fingers and hide
one in every swimming pool in America
please calm down satan

Heroin Monkey

A screenshot of a post that asks, "How do I stop my husband from going "goblin mode" during sex?? My husband says "goblin mode activated" when we start to have sex, growls, and acts like a caveman, and then says "goblin mode off" when we stop, and then pretends to not know what I'm talking about when I ask him about it."

MEME LORD

A picture shows the square button on a Playstation controller. Next to it is a picture of an elbow with the Mexican flag above it. Both images are zoomed in to show the texture.

Face mc shooty

A meme with a still from the TV show "Dexter". The text says: "When someone you don't fw starts yapping so you gotta look at them like this."

Heroin Monkey

1) buy a lobster
[deleted] by
My friend is in forensics and works on crime
scenes. They find a woman laying on the
bathroom floor with a head wound and live
baby shrimp on the floor with a smell of burnt
residue. After 3 days of investigation, they
figured out what happened.
Long story short, she bought a lobster from
the market. In the market, they feed the
lobster live baby shrimp until they're sold. This
woman brings the lobster home, inserts the
lobster's tail into her vagina, lights a lighter
and puts the flame towards the lobster's head,
so the lobster will frantically start shaking his
tail (which is inside her vagina), giving her the
jollies. Apparently she killed the lobster from
burning his head too long, the lobster, being
dead, voids his bowels, causing this lobster to
shit live baby shrimp into her vagina. This
woman then goes to pee and sees live baby
shrimp crawling out of her vagina, she freaks
out, falls, and cracks her head open on the
bathtub and dies.
it happened in Chicago in 2001
?
---
14
1) wait for horny
Chicago 2001
"Lobster Love" Incident

blach66

The image shows an advertisement for an "Autism Test" by FREEQUIZGAMES. The ad features a rainbow-colored infinity symbol made of circles, and a blue "START TEST" button below it. Above the image is the text "Seeing this advert just took me out of my depression."

Smexy Baka

Me when my friends start flirting with each other

A close-up of a digital drawing of a character with pink hair and cat ears. The character's expression is one of slight discomfort, with a small frown and eyes looking straight ahead. The background is black.

Heroin Monkey

A screenshot of a forum where the first user argues that arrays should start at one and that there can never be 0 of anything. The second user replies with the question: "Number of women you've slept with"

Raptor

Le start of a wonderful relationship!!!!!

The image is a comic strip with eight panels showing the steps of a disastrous date. The first panel shows a girl with blond hair happily looking at her phone. The text above says, "step 1: get a date with a hot guy." The second panel shows the girl meeting a trollface character in person. The text says, "step 2: meet him in person". The third panel shows the trollface character stabbing the girl with a knife, with blood spurting out. The fourth panel shows the girl's head falling backward from the stab. The fifth panel shows the girl's head on the ground, her eyes lifeless. The sixth panel shows her head decaying. The seventh panel shows the girl's skull and bones on the ground, and the eighth panel shows the same remains against the background of a reddish-orange forest.

Cupツ

Oh

A text message conversation. The first message says, "Started my juice cleanse yesterday and also went for a hike." The second message says, "bullsh*t, what'd you really do?" The third message says, "drank 3 bottles of wine and fell down the stairs."

Heroin Monkey

A screenshot of a message request from the user "Local_toaster_fucker" saying "Check your toaster." The options are to accept or ignore the request.

gyattohio

A tweet that reads: "Math teacher: the boat is 50 feet long. Me: feet?!?! *starts jaking off*"

bruce

A cartoon image shows a woman with orange hair holding a baby. The text says: "When babies start talking: I just did a boom boom"

blach66

The image shows a distorted close-up of Spongebob Squarepants with a sinister expression. The text on the image reads: "WHEN YOU KILL A 5 YEAR OLD IN COD AND THEY START CRYING FOR THEY'RE PARENTS."

⭐️🌙✨SUNNA AHMAD✨🌙⭐️

How it used to be

The image shows a cartoon character with his arms stretched out, with the text "2020 is starting to feel like it's being run by this guy" above him.

Heroin Monkey

A man is standing in front of a wall with text overlayed on the image. The text describes a story about visiting a petting zoo, painting hair, and cow kidnapping.

ur mommy

giving people karma

A young boy with a bowl cut smiles mischievously. The text on the image says, "Old people at weddings always poke me and say, 'You're next.' So, I started doing the same thing to them at funerals."

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