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Heroin Monkey
2 months ago
A screenshot of a Twitter thread by user 'ka vinki' (@jkavinsky). The first tweet says 'getting hit by a car kinda fun fr it feels like an action movie when u roll over the hood'. The second tweet is a reply to the first, stating 'driver was crying like she killed me or something relax'. The third tweet is another reply, saying 'nurse asked me to rate the pain 1 to 10 n i said 25 n started screaming i'm getting this morphine one way or another'.
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    3 months ago
    A drawing shows a diagram of a machine. On the left is a crocodile labeled as "Death roll machine". In the middle is raw meat attached to a generator, which is in turn connected to the powerlines of the entire US electrical grid.
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    3 months ago
    A man looking upset is pictured above a comment that reads: "I have your face on a carpet and I like to strip naked and cover myself in honey and roll around on the carpet until I pee (love your bellybutton)." Text over the man reads: "Bro leave this man alone."
  • 0
  • Why should you care
    8 months ago

    Truly are

    A set of translucent red and white dice with the title "The Cursed dice" above. The text describes the strange properties of cursed dice, including their unnatural glow, and their ability to roll specific numbers on command.
  • 0
  • Unimportant Intelligence
    8 months ago

    heh

    The image has a black background and white text that reads, "DID YOU KNOW THAT YOU CAN'T BREATHE FAST AND STICK YOUR TONGUE OUT AT THE SAME TIME?" Below that is "GOOD BOY! NOW, SIT AND ROLL!"
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    10 months ago
    NEWS
Pantless driver dies
after being ejected
through his sunroof
while masturbating
to porn on a
cellphone when the
car crashed and
rolled over
  • 0
  • Sooploosh MacSchnibble
    11 months ago
    A large, colorful beach ball, with a man standing next to it. The text below the image reads: "A fun way to ruin a weekend and blow 100 bucks. We took this ball to the beach and after close to 2 hours to pump it up, we pushed it around for about 10 fun filled minutes. That was when the wind picked it up and sent it huddling down the beach at about 40 knots. It destroyed everything in its path. Children screamed in terror at the giant inflatable monster that crushed their sand castles. Grown men were knocked down trying to save their families. The faster we chased it, the faster it rolled. It was like it was mocking us. Eventually, we had to stop running after it because its path of injury and destruction was going to cost us a fortune in legal fees. Rumor has it that it can still be seen stalking innocent families on the Florida panhandle. We lost it in South Carolina, so there is something to be said about its durability."
  • 0
  • Anonymous
    1 year ago
    A chimpanzee with a comical expression and wide open mouth. The text says: "Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe you'll find a brain back there."
  • 0
  • Anonymous
    1 year ago
    A two-panel comic shows a large pig telling a smaller pig, "Your father is rolling in his grave!" The bottom panel shows a hot dog roller with a single hot dog and condiments next to it.
  • 0
  • MEME LORD
    1 year ago
    A yellow emoji with wide eyes, exaggerated eyelashes, and a large, open mouth is holding a fist to its mouth. The text above reads, "Love, that's not the coughing emoji. Edited to add: as of this morning (1st April), Tanunda is now doing a drive through. You can just explain your symptoms, and drive through and get tested - no appointment needed for this. As for the walk in clinic at the back of the hospital - this is STILL operating and STILL requires you to make an appointment. Thanks everyone! Hi everyone. A member wanted me to update you on the Corona Virus Health Testing Station set up at Tanunda Hospital. Please don't just roll up, as y..."
  • 0
  • DaRey1Cray
    1 year ago

    DIS IS NUT FOR KIDS

    A product image of a green figure attached to a toothpaste tube and covering the opening. The text on the image reads: 'Toothpaste Cap Kids Toothpaste Attachment. Visit the Handmade Store. 4.0 stars. 15 ratings. Best Price on Amazon. -30% $8.99. List Price: $12.90. FREE Returns. A fun toothpaste cover that will make kids love brushing teeth. Produced in a 3D printer with organic PLA material that can be degraded in nature. It is placed on the cap of the toothpaste tube instead of the toothpaste cap. (Not compatible with non-standard pastes) It is not a hazardous material (toy). Do not wash in hot water or in the machine. The toothpaste tube product in the product is for promotional purposes. You can contact us for color preferences.'
  • 0
  • Anonymous
    1 year ago
    A man is smiling while looking at his phone in bed. The text says, "when you finally have enough battery percentage to roll over on the other side of the bed."
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    A Valentine's Day card featuring a picture of Rick Astley with the text: "i'll keep u rolling all night long. to: from:".
  • 0
  • i love cheeks and toes bruh
    1 year ago

    ill suck on that big toe for 5 bucks in the back of an alley way to be honest

    The image consists of two parts. On the left, there is an image of a 'Foot by the Foot' candy package with the text "NO ARTIFICIAL FLAVORS" and "HAND FREE". The package shows feet with arms instead of legs. The text also says, "35lb (15875.7g) ROLL 1 [25.36 FEET PER ROLL] PER FOOT 9001 CALORIES 5 TOENAILS 0 BUNIONS". On the right, there is an image of a single foot with a large toe and the text "imagine if we had one giant toe instead of multiple little ones". There are also small feet in heels shown in the upper left corner.
  • 0
  • LoserIsPro
    2 years ago

    I got all max 1st try

    A screenshot of a dice rolling game with the numbers 4, 6, 8, 10, 12, and 20 displayed as dice. The total shown is 60.
  • 3
  • LoserIsPro
    2 years ago

    I was rolling dice online and this is the first two I get (again)

    Two orange dice are displayed, one showing '4' and the other '20'. The total is '24'. Below the dice, there is a button with the text 'Roll'.
  • 11
  • LoserIsPro
    2 years ago

    I was rolling dice online and this is the first two I get

    Two red ten-sided dice with the numbers 9 and 11 are displayed on a screen. The total is 20. Below, there is a button labeled "Roll".
  • 4
  • the pokemon meme collector
    2 years ago

    the rick roll lol

    A Pokemon card featuring Rick Astley. It has his picture and the text 'Rick Roll;D. Does severe damage to your pokemon's ear!!!' and 'Never Gonna' Give You Up. Your pokemon wants to break up with him but he will never give it up!!! Stupid 80's artist!!!'
  • 0
  • PokemonCardMemeBoiiii
    2 years ago
    A Pokémon card featuring an 8-ball. The card's title is "8-Ball" with the type "Billiard 8-ball Pokémon". It lists the attacks "Roll Out" and "Stick Wack", describing the effect and damage. The card also shows weakness, resistance, and retreat cost. The card is a parody of a standard Pokemon card design.
  • 0
  • 😝 SWEET B*TCH😝
    2 years ago

    you

    A bulldog is walking on grass with its tongue sticking out. The text on the image says: "I'VE SPOTTED SOMETHING DEAD. MUST GO ROLL IN IT."
  • 0
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