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Jokes
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Machine memes

Post meme

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Beer

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows a blurred scene of two figures fighting. The text overlay reads: "Me fighting off Child Protective Services from taking away my beer getting machine."

Hell

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

An Amish man wearing a straw hat and blue shirt is falling through a hole in the floor, with flames rising around him. He appears surprised and is raising his hands. The floor is surrounded by several voting machines. The text on the image reads: "U.S. NOV 5, 2024. Amish Man Falls Through Trap Door Directly To Hell After Using Electronic Voting Machine."

Gym

《 rmk 》 · 3 years ago

welcome to america

A close-up photo of a gym machine seat with visible wear and tear and some unknown drops on it. There is text on the image: "i'm not going to this gym anymore" and a TikTok handle "@kfobb".

Noise

Anonymous · 1 year ago

The image shows two objects. The left object is a sound machine with a pair of glasses in front. The text reads "White Noise Machine". The right object is a smoke detector with the battery exposed. The text reads "Black Noise Machine".

Hospital

Nateツ · 2 years ago

A cartoon character, Ralph, looks up with a confused expression. The text on the image says, 'When you unplug all the noisy beeping machines in the hospital and everyone starts sleeping better. Why do I fix everything I touch?'

Pain

OzzyTheDinoo · 2 years ago

lmfao true

The image shows a person lying face-down on a mat with a large steamroller positioned directly above them. The text on the image says, "What my back needs".

Toothpaste

R3Y · 2 years ago

DIS IS NUT FOR KIDS

A product image of a green figure attached to a toothpaste tube and covering the opening. The text on the image reads: 'Toothpaste Cap Kids Toothpaste Attachment. Visit the Handmade Store. 4.0 stars. 15 ratings. Best Price on Amazon. -30% $8.99. List Price: $12.90. FREE Returns. A fun toothpaste cover that will make kids love brushing teeth. Produced in a 3D printer with organic PLA material that can be degraded in nature. It is placed on the cap of the toothpaste tube instead of the toothpaste cap. (Not compatible with non-standard pastes) It is not a hazardous material (toy). Do not wash in hot water or in the machine. The toothpaste tube product in the product is for promotional purposes. You can contact us for color preferences.'

Leak

Anonymous · 2 years ago

A photo of a wooden floor with a large, dark stain resembling a human body shape. Text above the image reads: "We took up the carpet in our apartment. My landlord said it's from a leak from a washing machine."

Waluigi

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image is a mock-up of a Wii game cover with the text "WALUIGI GETS HIS WALUWEENIE STUCK IN A VENDING MACHINE REMASTERED" written on it. The character Waluigi is shown peeking out from the side.

Body

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A black and white image of a skeleton in a suit and hat, smoking and holding playing cards, with the text "MY BODY IS A MACHINE THAT TURNS POKER CHIPS INTO DIVORCE PAPERS" layered on top of the image.

Pedophile

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A photo shows two workers in hard hats and reflective vests carrying a body wrapped in a white sheet toward a large orange wood chipper machine. The machine's chute is spraying out white particles. Text overlay on the image reads "PEDOPHILE REMOVAL MACHINE".

Strawberry

Heroin Monkey · 10 months ago

Gym

𝗚𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗶𝗯𝗮̈𝗿𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗻 · 1 year ago

The image shows two contrasting photos with text above each. The first photo, labeled "Gyms on January 1st", depicts a densely packed crowd of people. The second photo, labeled "Gyms on January 2nd", shows an empty gym with rows of exercise machines.

Request

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A photo of Zack de la Rocha, the singer from Rage Against the Machine, holding a microphone, with a speech bubble that says "I beg your pardon, but I am unlikely to fulfill your request." Text at the bottom reads, "kindly object to the machine."

Animal

big [fire] balls · 1 year ago

The image shows a three-panel comic strip. The first panel asks, "Are platypuses carnivores or herbivores?" The second panel shows a platypus and states, "They're neither." The third panel shows a pile of dead animals with blood, and another platypus on top stating, "Platypuses are godless killing machines."

Machine Gun

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

An image of a homemade machine gun. The gun is made from an electric drill, a wooden gun stock, and metal components. Text underneath the image reads: "80-vuotias hämeenlinnalaisinsinööri kehitteli porakoneesta konetuliaseen, jonka tulinopeus on 420 laukausta minuutissa. Aseeseen sopivat 22 kaliiperin panokset. An 80-year old engineer from Hämeenlinna (a city in Finland) made a machine gun out of an electric drill, which has a firing speed of 420 shots per minute. The gun takes .22 rounds."

Toaster

TechPriestGotDrip · 3 years ago

When you turn 400 those nasty thoughts sometimes peer in, but if you're lucky, you can be cleansed by the machine spirit by simply visiting your local tech priest.

A picture of a cartoon character with white hair and a sly smile, with the text "Parents: are you still a virgin? The toaster:"

Nicolas Cage

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A four-panel image featuring photos of Nicolas Cage in various intense and expressive poses, overlaid with the text "Cage AGAINST THE MACHINE."

Clothing

Jazzy💕 · 2 years ago

and that's on period

A photo features a close-up of Cardi B looking slightly amused or unimpressed. Text above her reads: "Why are you wearing that again?" Because I paid for it and I have a washing machine.

Body

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A skeleton is shown lifting weights, with text overlaid saying 'My body is a machine that turns tiddies into sucked tiddies.'

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