How did Harry Potter get down the hill? Running, JK rolling!
What do call a magic owl
HOOdini
Trump and two of his friends are stranded on an island with no internet connection and no way of getting home. As they frantically run around the island trying to get a signal so Trump can call his private helicopter to come and pick them up, Trump's wig falls off and lands on a magical lamp, from which suddenly appears a genie. As Trump replaces his wig, the genie announces that he will grant each man one wish for freeing him. The men stop to confer. The first one says he will wish for a plane to rescue him, the second wishes for a boat to rescue him and they tell Trump to wish for a helicopter to rescue him. Trump, being Trump, nods and says yes but he wasn't really listening. Then they approach the genie. The first one of Trump's friends wishes for a plane to rescue him, as agreed. The second one of Trump's friends wishes for a boat to rescue him, as agreed. Then Trump is left all alone, but instead of wishing for a helicopter to rescue him, as agreed, he says, "Aww, I'm lonely now. I wish both my friends were here with me!"
the harry potter fanbase
Why does peter pan always fly because he NeverLands
What is the Harry Potter spell that aborts babies?
Fetus Deletus!
Donald Trump was golfing with Barack Obama. The Donald said, "Listen Barack, I'm getting older and I'm having trouble sexually satisfying my young wife. I know that you black guys are supposed to be magic in bed. Can you give me a few pointers?" Barack gave Donald a few ideas and that night Donald made love to his wife. He did everything he was told. He started out slowly entering his wife gently then finished hard. Melania came quickly screaming. "Oh Donald, You fuck just like Barack Obama."
what do you say when trumps is still president during 2020? magic
A Mexican magician says he will disappear on the count of three. He says, 'uno, dos...' and poof. He disappears without a tres."
What do you get if you cross a pig and a witch with sand? - A ham sandwich
What do you call a dog that can do magic? A Labracadabrador
How did Voldemort lose his nose? From uncontrolled Gold Mining!
Voldemort: Knock Knock. Harry Potter: Who's There? Voldemort: You Know. Harry Potter: You Know Who? Voldemort: Exactly!
What kind of dog can do magic tricks? -- A labracadabrador.
A guy finds a genie...
He says, "I wish I was better at talking to women."
"Poof!" the genie says, "You're gay!"
