Maggot jokes
So your wife has died, and now she is marginally better in bed than before.
If you really want to get her to wiggle, simply add maggots.
Maggot.
My mom has a policy where if you kill a butterfly, no butter for a week, and if you kill a grub, no grub for a week. She killed a cockroach today. I have some bad news for her.
God creates a mosquito :)
God: Okay, so make it reeeeally tiny. Like less than half a fly.
Angel: okay... a bug.
God: now give it’s face a sword, but it has a hole so it’s basically a mouth.
Angel: weird... but okay...
God: and give it wings.
Angel: eh, not half bad Go-
God: NOW MAKE IT EAT THE BLOOD OF ALL LIVING ANIMALS AND HUMANS
Angel: *shook* o-okay
God: okay. Now make sure whenever a human is bit it feels the pain of a million suns burning it, making it scratch until it bleeds out.
Angel: .-.
God: and make sure it also transfers diseases through the species. Give ‘em a taste ‘o that! *evil grin*
Angel: *cries*
Angel: *whispers; I’m so sorry..*
Having cockroaches in the house is a sign that you've food.
These things are like Ugandan girls, they hate poverty.
I was reading this in class and laughed at loud, i had to clear all my history of jokes
Community talk
MORNING YOU MAGGOTS
What the fuck did you just say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the navy seals, and I've been involved with numerous on Al-Queada, and I have over 30 confirmed kills, I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but another target. I'll wipe you the Fuck of with precision the likes of it has never been seen on … Read more
I will slit your throat and pour maggots in it