Loss jokes
What do you call an orphan with a selfie?
A family portrait.
I saw a little boy begging for money.
I said, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yes, what gave me away?"
I said, "Your parents!"
The other day my mom called me a retard.
I'm now an orphan.
What do orphans call a selfie?
A family photo.
Why can’t orphans f*ck their mom?
Because they don’t have one.
Q: Why does an orphan do badly at Baseball?
A: Because they can't find home.
The teacher once said to some students, "I was an orphan before your principal hired me."
The students said, "Oof, that is sad."
The teacher tried to ignore them and take attendance. She said, "Is anyone missing?"
The students said, "Your parents."
The teacher got offended and later that day quit her job.
"Knock knock."
Orphan: "Who's there?"
"Not your parents."
"I hate when people make 9/11 jokes because my grandfather died during the Twin Tower attacks. He was the best pilot in Saudi Arabia."
What did the orphan say to his mom?
Where are you?
Today was no fun. A rhino escaped from the zoo and ate two parents, and I lost my job as zookeeper.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
There is an upside to being an orphan.
Every bag of chips is family size.
Why can orphans go to Thacker Jewelry?
They love to see the whole family.
I was dying when I called my sister and she said, "Hi, this is Pepperoni's pizza and abortion clinic; your loss, our sauce. How may I help you today?"
You: Knock knock. Other person: Who is there? You: Not your parents.
Why do orphans have no home?
Because they didn't have a family to give them one.
What do you call an orphan's selfie?
A family photo.
Why do orphans hate cricket?
Because they can't get a "homerun."
I created a website for orphans, but there was no homepage.