Living Will jokes

Cooper is the best to ever live.

Q: Do you know why God created yeast infections?

A: So women will know what it's like to live with an irritating cunt, too.

What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that lives with the royal family?

Rolls Royce.

A piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner.

"Oh, Bunsen, my flame," the sodium swooned. "I melt whenever I see you!"

The Bunsen burner replied, "Calm down. It's just a phase you're going through."

If you give a man a plane ticket, he will fly for a couple of hours, but if you push a man out of a plane, he will fly for the rest of his life :)

Why don’t orphans live in villages?

Because they will get abandoned.

Yo momma is so stupid, she saw an anime and started eating a live rabbit, and thought she would get powers!

I live next to a kindergarten, and yesterday they had a fire drill. It was kinda weird because normally it's me who has a drill around little children.

Christmas. Living proof arseholes exist.

What kind of bug lives in a graveyard?

A zom-BEE.

Q. What's the best part of living in Alabama?

A. Not having to change your last name when you get married.

I did a good walk and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and people live in the house with my dog. I had to a dog and.

You know when people say a joke about living?

That's because we are all living a joke.

My Wife: How much do you love me??

Me: Count all the stars.

My Wife: Aww, infinity.

Me: No, a waste of time.

Chuck Norris makes the living room the dying room!

You know what the difference between Kobe Bryant and Russell Westbrook is?

He wears 0 and Kobe has 0 lives left.

Little Johnny walks into the living room and asks his parents, "Mom, Dad, what do you get when you crossbreed a bulldog and shih tzu?"

The mother and father shrug and say, "We have no idea, Johnny. What do you get?" and little Johnny replies, "You get a bullshit."

Why can't an orphan live peacefully?

Technoblade: As a ghost, he could locate all orphans within 2 weeks.

What’s the difference between a cat and a frog?

A cat has nine lives, and a frog croaks every day.

Bubba couldn't make rent, so he offered to sleep with the landlady instead.

I think he forgot he lived in his mom's basement.