What do my wife and dinner have in common? They are both vegetables.
Me and rose bushes have something in common: mangled, can hurt, red, and people only like one part.
Why don't a gun and an orphan have anything in common? The gun is actually useful.
What does a deaf person and an orphan have in common? They both can’t hear their parents.
Why can’t an orphan go to Family Dollar? They don’t have a family.
Don’t mess with an emo because if their friends pull up, you gotta fight the suicide squad.
What do Ligma and Bofa have in common?
They both ride on my dick.
What does an orphan and a dog have in common?
Both got taken from their parents.
What do orphans and deaf people have in common?
They can't here there parents.
What does a pizza and a Mexican have in common?
One can feed a family.
Q: What does a slice of pizza and an F grade have in common?
A: They're both cheesy.
What does a man masturbating and a mayo bottle have in common?
They can both squirt out their cum.
One day the mailman came to drop the mail off, then he asked if I could use the bathroom. I said yeah. The thing is, my mom was coming out of the shower naked, and when she opened the door, it was me and the mailman.
Now, when the mailman sees me, he says to me, "We got something in common, we both saw your mom naked."
What don't Rick Astley and the Twin Towers have in common?
One won't let you down, while the other will.
Q: What do Satan and a priest have in common?
A: They both want Anthony's neck.
Q: What do Satan and a priest have in common?
A: They both love naughty souls.
What does an Xbox/PlayStation and Michael Jackson have in common?
Kids turn them on.
What does a lesbian have in common with a mechanic? Snap-on tools.
Q: What do Burger King and Michael Jackson have in common?
A: They put meat on five-year-old buns.
Why do the twin towers and my mom have in common? They fell over.
What do the Titanic and the Montréal Canadiens have in common? They both sank to the bottom of the Atlantic.
What do emo kids and Hitler have in common?
There's gonna be more brains on the wall when they lose something.
