in-between jokes

Priest

    • What do priests and McDonald's have in common? They both like putting their meat in between 5-year-old buns.

    Priest

    • What's similar between a priest and McDonald's?

    They both shove their meat in between 10 year old buns.

  • 1

    • School shooting

    • 1) Did you hear the one about the school shooting? Actually, I better not... You wouldn't understand, it's aimed more towards a younger audience.

    2) 6 was scared cuz 7 8 9, so why was 10 scared? Because it was in between 9/11.

    3) 10 dead babies.

  • 1

    • Keyhole

    • Little Johnny's mom is taking a shower. Little Johnny walks in and asks, "What is that in between your legs?" Mommy says, "That is my keyhole." The next day, Little Johnny sees his dad taking a shower and Little Johnny asks, "What is that in between your legs?" Daddy says, "That is my key." The next day Little Johnny says to his dad, "Looks like the neighbor has the key to Mommy's keyhole too."

  • 17

    • Wife

    • I got breast implants for my wife to squeeze on as she thrusts on my meat while straddled in between my legs.

  • 0

    • Bet

    • An old man gets a call from the IRS.

    The man on the phone says, “We’ve noticed large sums of money coming in and going out of your account constantly, and we gotta get this straight. Come in tomorrow and we’ll have a chat about this.” The old man thinks for a while and then decides he better get his lawyer to come with him.

    The next day the old man and his lawyer show up to the IRS office, and the man there says, ”So we’ve noticed these large sums of money entering and leaving your account nonstop. Can you explain this?” The man replies, ”Well, I will bet on pretty much anything. Like this! I bet you 10,000 I can bite my own eye.” The agent takes the bet, and the man takes out his glass eye and bites it. He then says, ”Wait. I’ll give you a chance to earn your money back, and more! I bet you 20,000 I can bite my other eye.” The agent thinks a minute and realizing the man isn’t blind, takes the bet. The old man takes out his false teeth and bites his other eye. He then says, ”Alright, last chance. I bet you 50,000 I can stand on this side of your office and pee into that wastebasket on the opposite side without getting a drop anywhere in between.” The agent thinks real hard but decides it’s impossible, so takes the bet. The man unzips his pants and pees all over the IRS agent’s desk. The agent jumps up and down and says, “Haha! I got you now!” But the man's lawyer goes pale in the face, sinks his head in his hands, and says, “He bet me 100,000 on the way over here that he could piss all over your desk and you’d just love it!”

  • 2

    • Community talk

    • On maps, Cuba is crocodile-shaped, but when I look at a flat paper outline, I cannot see the beautiful farm on the crocodile’s belly. I can’t find the palm trees, or bright coral beaches where flying fish leap, gleaming like rainbows.

    end of part 3start of part 4 ​Box startsSometimes, I feel like a rolling wave of the sea, a wave that can only belong in between the two solid shores.

    Sometimes, I feel like a bridge, or a storm.

    • This is going to be a mouthful, but I suggest you read it all. Posting as anonymous, but yeah, it's Amy. A lot wrong has happened on this site, like a LOT. And for me, this involved the insults & constant wars & whatnot. After it was all over, I think I started building myself off my hatred of you all. I started becoming my hatred ina way. Not a day went by that I didn't remember the hurt I felt. Also, somewhere alon… Read more

    • Still writing that long ass story btw, suggestions are GREATLY APPRECIATED!!! So far I have a few arcs:

    - The characters join the Cartel - They travel across the desert on a train and meet an inventor - The inventor teleports them to medieval Scotland - They help Scotland win their war for Independence - They sort of kidnap a Scottish girl and teleport back to present-day - She meets her ancestor and he becomes a z… Read more

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