Impression jokes
Three men are outside Heaven's gates waiting to go through Heaven. The angel at the gate tells them, "Depending on the length of time and your faithfulness to your last partner decides your way across the bridge to Heaven."
The first guy says, "I was with my wife for 5 years and cheated 3 times." The angel gives him an old model pick up. The second guy says, "11 years and only once," and is granted a Mercedes.
The last man says, "20 years and not once. I loved her with all my heart," and with the angel impressed, he gets a gold edition Lamborghini and sets off ahead of the other two men. Hours later, the two men catch up to him crying behind the wheel and one says, "I know we are dead, but it could be much worse."
The guy looks up and says, "How! I just went past my wife on a skateboard!"
jay Z
Fr fr
Does he look like phonk face
A flirting tip for the boys
Community talk
im playing dress to impresss
for your whole life people expected things from you. be good, be better, be successful, be happy, and you've tried, sometimes at the expense of your own peace, but to be good enough for others, maybe some of it helped, but a lot of it just made you feel like youre never doing enough, but whos life are you really living? whos voice are you trying to impress? if its not yours, let it go. you dont have to chase after a perfect life to deserve peace. youre not a list of achievements, youre a person, and your life, gets to feel like yours.
Ladies and gentlemen of the forest, let us take a moment to reflect on the astounding uselessness of this creature we call 'the bear.' What does it truly contribute, besides noise, mud tracks, and an endless appetite for honey? It claims strength, yet spends half its life asleep. It claims dominance, yet the most impressive thing it can do is knock over a picnic basket and pretend that’s a skill.
This so-called 'kin… Read more