Hurty jokes

What time are most dentist appointments? Tooth hurty.

Dad: What time do you wanna go to the dentist?

Daughter: *tooth hurty*

Dad: All right.

What time is it when you have a toothache?

2:30 (Tooth hurty).

What time do Chinese people go to the dentist?

Tooth hurty (2:30).

You know what really gets me under my skin when I'm down? Sharpener blades.

Bought my son a trampoline for his birthday. The ungrateful fucker just sat in his wheelchair and cried.

Someone told me that you can let out all your anger by writing letters about everyone you hate and then burning them... But I was just wondering... should I keep the letters?

When you're fighting with the emo kid and he brings his friends. Now you gotta fight the suicide squad.

My best friend looked at my arms and said, "Stop, sh*t, it's bad," then turns right around and says, "You look like a tiger."

So from here on out I am now Finn, the self-harming tiger.