HI jokes
There once was a man who beat his wife, And before he even knew it, he ended her life. His hands were a mess, all red and bloody, He had to find somewhere to hide the body.
My boyfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of his Honda Civic, but I refused. If I’m going to have sex, it’s going to be on my own Accord.
Why did Jordan cross the road? So he could get to his house.
Q: What did Darth Vader say to his smashed wristwatch?
A: I find your lack of face disturbing.
I can't remember the last full conversation I had with my grandfather.
Good thing is, since he hit his head, he can't remember either.
Memes
He huffed and he puffed, but instead of blowing the house, he choked it down with his mom.
His favorite drink was his dribble.
Why did the man say "hi ti bye?"
Why did the orphan cross the road?
He thought he saw his mother.
"I see, I see." "Oh, do you see?" "I see 1st place looking at me." "Hi, don’t be shy, just say hi." She was shy, she didn’t say hi. Softball cheers.
The DNA told the tailor that he couldn't find his genes.
Connor: Hi Mom.
Mom:
Connor: I forgot I'm adopted to 2 dads!
I broke the sink yesterday; the handle just blew right off! My dad was so mad, he blew his stack!
My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away.
Where does Santa send his children to study?
The Elf-phabets.
The DNA told the tailor he couldn't find his genes.
Hi, my name's Dixy.
Dixy Normis.
Why did you say hi? Babies don't talk.
Stephen Hawking died because he got unplugged from his Ethernet cord.
One day, a chemistry teacher asked his student, whose name is Raj, "What is the chemical formula of water?"
The Raj replied, "HIJKLMNO."
The teacher asked, "What is this rubbish?"
The Raj replied, "Yesterday, you taught the chemical formula of water is H2O."