Fruit jokes
My cousin is a surgeon.
Last year he botched a surgery he was doing on a patient who happened to be gay. He's being sued for malpractice for turning a fruit into a vegetable.
When I was a kid, I knew a woman named Betty Pears.
She died a horrible death from Alzheimer's.
I thought a pear was a fruit, not a vegetable!
Q: What's the difference between Terri Schiavo and a tomato?
A: A tomato isn't a vegetable.
I’d make fun of transgender women, but that’s low hanging fruit.
Why'd Billy get fired from the banana factory?
He kept throwing with the bent one.
Are people too thick to realize the difference between a fruit, a vegetable, and a person?
I "onerie," or however you spell it, I like to replace all romance or similar memes with duck memes. Just comment duck memes there and change Valentine's Day to Duck Day. Also, for the joke:
Why did the duck walk up to the lemonade stand?
Because he wanted grapes.
I'm starting a new charity where homosexuals help the extremely handicapped.
I'm calling it "Fruits and Vegetables".
Roses are red, oranges are orange.
Get a life, quit watching porn.
What do you call a gay drive-by?
A fruit roll up.
What do you call a banana that can dance?
CHUPAPIMUNYANYO BUISNESS [sic]
What’s the difference between jelly and jam?
You can’t “jelly” it in her ass.
What do you call a gay guy eating Cheerios?
Fruit Loops.
What do you call it when a gay guy eats Cheerios?
Fruit Loops.
It's no surprise Donald Trump moved to Florida. That's where the oranges are.
Gay gang members don't do drive-bys, they do fruit roll-ups.
Scientists say a banana a day is great for the colon.
But you gotta eat it!
How do butts communicate?
By using CRACK-BERRIES!
Why download Fruit Ninja when you have your arm?
What do rappers like cantaloupe?
Because they’re always dropping fresh MELON!