Family jokes
What do Bob Ross's painting and the orphanage have in common?
They're both filled with happy little accidents.
Why was the orphan confused at the baseball game?
They kept yelling, "Go home!"
What is the difference between an apple spread and an orphan spread?
Apples get picked.
What's an orphan's least favorite joke?
Dad jokes.
I saw a little boy playing alone in the street. I told him that was a bad idea, then asked for his parents.
God, orphanages are fun to work at!!
If you're happy and you know it, f*** your mom.
My father touched me yesterday. I called him a priest.
What's the difference between an orphan and Stuart Little?
Stuart Little got chosen!
Why do orphans commit crimes?
It’s the only time they’re ever wanted.
Why does an orphan never learn how to drive? Because he has no dad to help him.
What does my dad and the Twin Towers have in common? They used to be with us, now it's just a sensitive topic.
Coworker: Knock knock.
Orphan: Who's there?
Coworker: Not your parents.
I was the second worst thing to happen to those orphans.
What issues don't orphans have?
Daddy issues.
I made Google Earth for orphan kids.
Sadly, it does not show where home is.
Boy: Will you remember me in a minute?
Mom: Yes.
Boy: Will you remember me in a day?
Mom: Yes.
Boy: Will you remember me in a year?
Mom: Yes.
Boy: Knock knock.
Mom: Who's there?
Boy: Bitch, you forgot me.
Why can’t orphans go on field trips?
Because they need a parent signature.
*P.O.V orphan wanting to go on school trip/camp*
Teacher: “Can I have your parent's signature? It isn’t filled out.”
Orphan: “Um yeah.... That’s gonna be hard....”
Teacher: “Why?”
Orphan: “I just have to find them first....”
Does an orphanage have daddy issues?
Yes, because he didn't come back from getting the milk.
Child: Hello, I can’t find my dad.
Stranger: Oh, well when and where did you last see him?
Child: Oh, I remember, 5 years ago he went to get some milk here.