I had a terrifying experience last night. I was alone in the house having a bath... when all of a sudden... I felt a tap on my shoulder.
There was once a grandfather. He had very little hair, and he lived in a forest.
On his death bed, he was fully bald. So he told his children, "You see my head? I have no hair. All of my hair has been wiped, and I hope this forest doesn't experience the same. Children, every time a tree is cut in this forest, plant a new one in its place."
So for years, and to this day, that forest still stands, each tree being replanted. All because of an old man and his re-seeding hairline.
Why do blind kids like plane crashes?
Because you can’t dislike what you have never seen.
Well, you know what they say, time flies when you're just a ball of anxiety and stress. :D
Anyone remember the following?
One day in Roblox, someone was arguing with me, and they asked me my age. "18." They said that they were twenty-two.
Me: "If you're so smart, what's the largest daycare game on Roblox?"
Him: "Yo Hair," he said. Then he left the game, and I said, "That is so messed up. Actually, that's bullcrap."
When I was in middle school, I was on my bus and people were doin' hairline jokes, and I heard this guy say, "Your hairline goes back to... uhhhhhh... 2042?"
My math teacher asked me what a liked term was. I told her I couldn't say, never experienced it.
Isn't having depersonalization mean that you like the animatronics off of FNAF/Five Nights at Freddy's?
(If you don't know what depersonalization is, look it up.)
How to know something won’t be fun:
Someone will say, "C'mon, it’ll be fun!"
Circumcision is like getting your dick sucked by a male. If you did not like it when you were a teenager, you probably will not like it when you become an adult.
Why do more men than women support abortion? So they can keep raping women and the victims will just abort their kids to not have to relive the experience!
I tried a lemonade from my friend. It tasted fantatastic!
The double slit experiment shows light particles are a wave that assemble in your presence. And you didn't even have to say a word!
I laughed at my life so hard.
*School shooting happens.*
Foreign exchange student: *Sobbing under desk.*
American student: "First time?"
Foreign exchange student: "Yeah, you?"
American student: "Hahaha. No, not my first time."
What's the difference between Monday and a dick?
They're not different. They're both unnecessarily long and hard.
Nostalgia hits you like a train.
It's so hard, you can even wake up.
The Good Old Days.
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.
Your mom is so old that her birth certificate says "expired."
