Police officer pulls over 2 Catholic priests. Says he’s looking for two child molesters.
Catholic priests looking at each other: We’ll do it!
i was in cooking class and my teacher said - does anyone know what a chopping board is similar to?
me and my friend just glanced at each other and burst out laughing.
long story short the teacher understood the joke and now we are both in daily therapy 😭💀
How do emo's compliment each other?
They say " I like your cuts g"
What's the definition of trust?
Two cannibals giving each other blowjobs.
What did one tampon say to the other tampon when they walked by each other on the street? Nothing. They were both stuck up cunts!
The reason that 👧 👧 are not 🚫 in 👦 👦 👦 👦 👦 🌳 🏘️ is because 👧 👧 can't keep their 👄 👄 👄 👄 shut about 👦 👦 👦 👦 👦 taking turns sucking each others 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭
2 pedophilles talking to each other: do you got 2 fives for 1 ten?
Two atoms are walking down the street and they run in to each other. One says to the other, "Are you all right?" "No, I lost an electron!" "Are you sure?" "Yeah, I’m positive!"
Me and my friend were roasting each other. She said, "You look like a Reese's cup." I replied, "You're so old, your pubic hairs are 50 shades of gray."
Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts
How do skeletons have sex?
They bone each other.
When two wheel chairs hit each other is it a fender bender
atoms never touch, so it means, we haven't touch each other or anything, so sir, I did not drop-kick that child
Q:There was two tampons walking down the road the other day guess what they said to each other
A:nothing cause they're both stuck up cunts
Two friends who've been bros for forever see each other in Wal-Mart in the card section. The first guy asks what he got his wife for her birthday. The second guy tells him he got her a Maserati and a card. The first guy tells him he got his wife a card and a dildo for her birthday. The second guy asks why he got his wife a dildo for her birthday. The first guy says, "If she doesn't like the card I got her, then she can go fuck herself!"
A teaher gives her kindergarden students four flavors of live savers and they have to guess the flavors the students guess cherry lime and orange. They dont know th last flavor. So the teacher gives them and hint and say its what your parents call each other. [honey] But a little girl shouts and says “ OMG there assholes.
Some people ask why jokes exist, I say when a mommy and daddy love each other very much they have sex and they make another one of you
I always hated being born a catholic as a kid, the way you have to keep kneeling down, bending over and standing up all within a few minutes of each other while at church, I was always thinking “for God’s sake just pick a position and fuck me”
Three Europeans come to America. They all get captured by Native Americans, who want to kill them. However, the Europeans beg to have their lives spared. The Native Americans agree not to kill them on one condition: the Europeans must go into the forest and bring back a fruit, and they will be informed what to do with it.
The first guy comes back with a peach. The Native American says, "Shove it up your ass, if you laugh we kill you." So, he shoves the peach up his ass, laughs, and the Native Americans kill him. The second guy comes back with a grape. The Native American tells him the same thing. He laughs, and the Native American kills him.
They both see each other in heaven, and the first guy says to the second guy, "I had a peach and peaches are fuzzy, so that's why I laughed. But you had a grape, what happened?" The second guy says, "Oh yeah, I was doing just fine until I saw the other guy come back with a pineapple!"
A policeman walks up to a van with two priests and says, "We're looking for two child molesters". The priests both look at each other for a moment and then say, "Okay, we'll do it".
