Donald jokes
Neo-Confederates all claim to be about "heritage" not "hate". Well, if your heritage consists of Kelly Clarkson, riding on siblings, and treating Donald Trump as if he's the second coming, then it really sucks to be you.
Bro, go work at McDonald's. Your hairline inspired their logo!
Johnny Depp to a 15-year-old girl: "Wow, look at that sexy body! Savvy!"
Michael Jackson, when talking about a 6-year-old boy: "The boy is mine! That doggone boy is mine! Don't waste your time...."
Donald Trump, Bill Clinton, and Jeffrey Epstein entering and exclaiming, "Wow, this place is more fun than the Playboy Mansion!"
"Hola soy Dora, do you see Donald Trump? That’s right, he’s at my house, and he’s building a wall to separate me and Caillou. And Mami won’t let him, so she was walled alive!"
Q: What do you get when you cross Viagra and Donald Trump?
A: Erection fraud. (Just a joke.)
Question: Why did Donald Trump convert to Judaism?
Answer: Because he heard that Vladimir Putin likes to drink vodka with "Orange Jews"!
I, for one, wish Donald Trump was President again. It's been a while since we had a presidential assassination.
All those people claiming Donald Trump is like Hitler need a reality check.
After all, it's not like Donald Trump could write a book.
Tell me a joke about my hairline.
No, because he don't got one, feel like Donald Trump, it don't move.
Your hairline looks like the McDonald's sign M.
What's the difference between Donald Trump and an orange?
The orange tastes good.
Donald Trump has been banned from Panera.
Why does Donald Trump love little boys? Because his hands look massive when he’s holding their tiny little prepubescent cocks.
So Johnny Depp made an appearance on the MTV Video Music Awards as an astronaut. It really looks like he wants to be the new Elon Musk, whatever career path is most viable for Depp. I got to admit, if launching crystal meth into your nostrils and your anus is as viable as launching rockets to Mars, Johnny Depp would surpass Elon Musk in net worth.
Then again, the money Depp spends on alcohol each month, he could have bought all of Michael Bloomberg's penthouses in Manhattan. Sure sounds like he also shares the same financial advisor as Donald Trump, who thought it was a magnificent idea to launch Trump Airlines and Trump Ice. He already shares the same pro-Kremlin lawyer, by the way.
What did Donald Trump serve to Justin Trudeau at a state dinner?
Poutine with Russian dressing!
Hello guys. It's me, Donald fuckin' Trump. Ask me anything in the comments, guys.
What do you get when you cross a cow and the Kool-Aid Man? Donald Trump, cuz of his red face and juicy tits.
*walks into a comedy night club* Owner: "You're doing standup tonight, right?" Noob Joker (you): "Yes, I am!" Owner: "Get onto the stage." Me: *walks up stage* Owner: "This is the standup comedian noobpro." Me: "Hey guys, how about some Donald Trump?" Crowd: *RUNS*
Say what you will about Donald Trump, at least he's not Biden.
What do McDonald's and priests have in common?
They both shove their meat into 10-year-old buns.