Tell me a joke about my hairline.
No, because he don't got one, feel like Donald Trump, it don't move.
Donald Jokes
Your hairline looks like the McDonald's sign M.
What's the difference between Donald Trump and an orange?
The orange tastes good.
Donald Trump has been banned from Panera.
Why does Donald Trump love little boys? Because his hands look massive when he’s holding their tiny little prepubescent cocks.
So Johnny Depp made an appearance on the MTV Video Music Awards as an astronaut. It really looks like he wants to be the new Elon Musk, whatever career path is most viable for Depp. I got to admit, if launching crystal meth into your nostrils and your anus is as viable as launching rockets to Mars, Johnny Depp would surpass Elon Musk in net worth.
Then again, the money Depp spends on alcohol each month, he could have bought all of Michael Bloomberg's penthouses in Manhattan. Sure sounds like he also shares the same financial advisor as Donald Trump, who thought it was a magnificent idea to launch Trump Airlines and Trump Ice. He already shares the same pro-Kremlin lawyer, by the way.
What did Donald Trump serve to Justin Trudeau at a state dinner?
Poutine with Russian dressing!
Hello guys. It's me, Donald fuckin' Trump. Ask me anything in the comments, guys.
What do you get when you cross a cow and the Kool-Aid Man? Donald Trump, cuz of his red face and juicy tits.
*walks into a comedy night club* Owner: "You're doing standup tonight, right?" Noob Joker (you): "Yes, I am!" Owner: "Get onto the stage." Me: *walks up stage* Owner: "This is the standup comedian noobpro." Me: "Hey guys, how about some Donald Trump?" Crowd: *RUNS*
Say what you will about Donald Trump, at least he's not Biden.
What do McDonald's and priests have in common?
They both shove their meat into 10-year-old buns.
Donald Trump will return to Twitter.
Donald Trump and the Pope were standing on a platform in front of a crowd of people. The Pope said to Donald Trump, “I can make everyone in this audience happy with one small swipe of my hand.”
Donald Trump replies, “That’s not possible. You’ll have to show me.” Then the Pope slaps him.
Donald Trump is so stupid his fanboys dislike this.
Your mom's so fat, Donald Trump built the wall around her.
Yo mama so fat, Donald Trump built a wall around her.
Why is Donald Trump so mad? Because he is a Trumpet!
A plane is going to crash. There are four passengers and only three parachutes. All the staff are safe and are gone, leaving the passengers. Ryan Reynolds is the first. He says, "My fans need me," and jumps. Donald Trump takes another and says, "I am the smartest president," and jumps, leaving one. There is a pope and a boy left. The pope says, "Child, my life is over and yours has just begun, take the last parachute." The boy replies, "Don't worry - Donald took my backpack."
Why didn't Donald Trump build the wall?
Because Mexicans did not and would not build the damn wall!
