Do jokes
How do you make an emo jump?
A cliff.
How do you give a redneck a circumcision? Kick his sister in the jaw.
What do you call it when a snowman throws a tantrum?
A meltdown.
What do you call an avocado that got shot? Glockamole.
Whenever you're mad, just punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Memes
What do you call an hourglass with no sand in it?
A waist of time.
F is for friends who don't talk to you.
U is for Ur alone.
N is for never having any plans at all, all you do is sit at home.
What do you call a Mexican under a carpet? Underlay, underlay.
What do you call an Afghan in the bath? A bath bomb.
I asked my friend if he would take a bullet for the last person he slept with.
He said hell yeah, I'd do anything for my sister!
Job Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in the next five years?
Me: I'd say my biggest weakness is listening.
What do you call an Irish lesbian? A gay lick.
What do you call an LGBTQ person getting grilled? LGBBQ.
I made it, DON'T COPY!!!
Q: What do you call a pervert with no legs?
A: A creepy crawly.
What do you call an Australian visiting the UK on holiday?
Returning to the scene of the crime.
What do you call a crowd of horny white women?
A field of cotton waiting to be picked.
What do you call Hitler speeding?
The Fast and the Fuherous.
How many people do you need to change a lightbulb?
Three. The first holds the ladder, the second one holds the lightbulb, and the third one spins the ladder.
What do you call a suicide bomber under the water?
Answer: A bath bomb.
What kind of music do wind turbines like?
They are big, heavy metal fans!