Do jokes
I hate it when people think I'm a boy because I have short hair. I mean, I'm gay, what do you expect?
Dad goat: Son, do you know what I like to eat?
Son goat: No, what?
Dad goat: Goat meat.
Son goat: *Gasps*
Dad goat: Nah, I'm just KIDing.
Why do planets circle the sun?
'Cause they like the game of ring-around-the-rosy.
What is a good time for dinner, and what do I do for you? And dinner, dinner, and what, yyyuyy dinner? 🍴 Night time.
What does an Asian call a penis? A wong.
What does an Asian do with its legs? It wok.
Memes
What do a blackjack dealer and my uncle have in common?
They both hit me face down on the table.
What do you call two Michael J. Fox's standing next to each other?
Parallel Parkinson's.
Why do mummies have trouble making friends?
What do you call a clown that is allergic to strawberries?
...Ollie the clown!
If you have 20 apples and you ate 2, how many do you have left?
0 because you have 20 and take away 2, you have 0 left.
What do you call a knight that has one arm? A first battle night.
What do you call a knight that lost both arms? A two battle useless knight.
What do an acting role and playing sports have in common?
If you break a leg, you get cast.
What do you call a pig doing a karate chop?
What do you call a bear with no ears? A b.
Yeah, that joke was unbearable.
My friend said to me, "How do you spell Tom?" and I said, "T-O-M-M." He said, "That's not how you spell 'it's Tom.' You have to take out one 'M'."
So I said, "But which one?"
What do you call a pig with two legs? Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhahahaa
What movie do orphans relate to the most?
"Spider-Man: No Way Home." (Either that or Batman.)
What do autistic retards and birds have in common?
They both flap their arms, lol.
Me: What do we need from there? I have a few things to do before I head out to the store, and then I will be home to pick up the stuff.
Random person: What stuff? 🤨
Me: What?
The person: You said you’re going to pick up “the stuff”!!! What do you mean by that?!
Me: Colourful flamingo fart.
When Lexa took Clarke out on a date, she walked past the candle shop, and she bought all the candles. After the date, they went back to the Heda's (Commander's) Tower, which is basically a huge candle. "All I wanna do is Candle you!"