Do jokes
Why do elephants paint their toes red, blue, green, orange, brown, and yellow?
So they can hide in a bag of M&Ms.
What do you call high Mexicans?
Baked beans ;)
What do you call an Asian? A stupid gook.
If a person walks off a hundred-foot cliff and halfway down screams, "Why did I do that?" Then a second person walks off the same one-hundred-foot cliff and screams the same verse, "Why did I do that?" Then another person walks off the cliff and screams the same line, "Why did I do that," and the next person does the same thing. What do you call that?
(Stupid People)
What do you call a person?
A person.
Memes
What do you call a fat bitch that eats cum from used condoms? Your mom!
A man found out that he was going to die.
A German doctor comes in and says "you have 10 more". The man yells out "10 WHAT!! DAYS!!!! WEEKS!!!". And the doctor says "No seconds". And the man says "9 SECONDS!!!" And the doctor says "Nein. Ten seconds". He asked "How many seconds do I have to live 10, 9 , or...?"
Then he died and learned how to say no in German....
A bicurious man goes to a gay bar.
A gay man offers him a drink.
The bi man explains he doesn't know if he's gay or not.
"That's fine," he says, "let's just have a drink."
The gay man asks him for a dance, and he explains again he isn't sure if he's gay or not.
Eventually, the gay man invites him to go home with him to hang out as friends.
They get to his house, and the gay man says, "Do you fancy having sex?"
He isn't sure, so the gay man explains, "I'll push in slow, and at any point you want to stop, make animal sounds, and if you like it, start singing."
So they get to it, and the gay man pushes in slowly, the bi man bursts out "MOOOOO MOOOOO MOOOOOOVVVEE CCLOSSEEERRRR"
Why do Indian men prefer fat women?
Because they worship cows.
What do you call Stephen Hawking when he eats too much?
As fat as Ben Dingley.
What do you call my IP? 74.125.224.72 hahahahahahahahaha
What do you call a white girl at Starbucks?
At home.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.
Q: What do you call a cow with only two legs?
A: Lean meat.
What do birds and autistic people have in common?
They both flap their arms.
Why do orphans like boomerangs?
Because they actually come back.
How do you surprise a 50-year-old man? By putting a 12-inch dick through his ass.
He said, "Best surprise ever!"
My mom said the only way to cure depression is to do what she does. She's dead.
Stranger: Do you want a lollipop?
Kid: No, I hate lollipops, so yeah, and you are not my daddy.
What does a shark smoke? Sea-weed.
How do whales breathe underwater? They take a deep meth.