Di jokes
The only reason Stephen Hawking died was because he saw the end.
Every single person on the plane died except for 2. How is that possible?
It said all the single people died; the 2 were a couple. That's how it was possible.
My son asked me, “What is angel cake made of?”
I reply by listing the ingredients in Mr. Kipling angel cakes. Then he shouts “STOP!” I stop as I reach food colorings. He slowly crawls towards me and says in a whisper, “Well, in my angel cake, I put angels in them.”
I freaked out about this, so I calmed down and asked who did you put in this angel cake. He said, “Grandma, the one who died last Saturday.”
One day, there was an ugly barnacle. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end!
Sat at a busy intersection with a slice of bread, waiting for a traffic jam.
Cut a hole in the rug so he could see a dirty floor show.
He took hay to bed to feed his nightmare.
Took a tape measure to bed to see how long he slept.
Put his nose out the window so the wind will blow it.
Died with his boots on because he didn't want to hurt his toes when he kicked the bucket.
What is the difference between a kid with cancer and dark humor?
Dark humor never dies!
Stephen Hawking died because he lost Wi-Fi connection.
One night, a girl said to her family, "Goodnight Mommy, Goodnight Daddy, Goodnight Grandma, Goodbye Grandpa." The next morning, her grandpa died. That night, she said, "Goodnight Mommy, Goodnight Daddy, Goodbye Grandma." The next morning, the grandma died. The dad started to fear for his life because he was next. That night, the girl said, "Goodnight Mommy, Goodbye Daddy." The next morning, the dad woke up and he was perfectly fine, but when he went into the kitchen, he saw his wife crying. When he asked her what's wrong, she said, "The mailman died."
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He didn't have enough room for any more RAM on his motherboard. I feel so bad for saying that!
No one:
Literally no one:
Abraham Lincoln: *dies*
John Wilkes Booth: *ranks up*
Stephen Hawking died because he tried downloading a free version of Windows 10.
My dog died.
JACK smoked some shit in the casino bathroom.
Then fucked a slut, played some slots, took some shots, then shot a JOKER!
It's a sad story, because JACK killed himself, but he died with a smile.
I made someone a PB and J sandwich... they died.
Stephen Hawking died because he was too far away from the Wi-Fi router.
There was a penguin breathing with his ass. One day, he sat down and he died.
How Steven Hawking died: because he moved too much during the day and ran out of juice.
Stephen Hawking died because he did a wheelie and unplugged his charger.
The reason Stephen Hawking died was because his ethernet cable disconnected.
Stephen Hawking died because he lost his WiFi connection.