Childcare jokes
Orphans can get away with anything really bad at school, because they can't be sent home for it.
What do you call a baby in the shower? A baby in the shower.
Why didn't the orphan go to the orphanage?
He didn't understand having a home, even if it was temporary.
Once I sucked my mum's titties. Most adopted people won't know about that.
Why can't orphans go outside?
Because they have no parents to watch them!
How do I feed the baby with my pants on?
what does an orphanage and a hospital have in common?
people go there to fix their mistakes.
Why can’t orphans win trophies?
Because they can’t take them home.
What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?
They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.
I'm sweating like Michael Jackson at a kindergarten.
I was watching my daughter play at the park. A woman came up to me and asked which one was mine. I said I was still choosing.
Why does an orphan always try to escape the orphanage?
Because he wants to get money to buy a family since they won't buy him.
How do you stop a baby from crawling on the floor?
Nail one hand to the ground...
How do you stop it from crawling in circles? Nail the other hand to the floor.
What's the difference between a sheet and a baby?
One of them is really loud when you iron it.
What school can’t orphans go to?
Home school.
How do you stop a baby from crying?
Throw a brick in its mouth.
A bomb is like a baby; when you drop it, everyone screams.
So, if she gargles your cum, is that a jacuzzi daycare?
They told me throwing babies was bad, but guess what I did yesterday? I threw my baby cousin down the escalator.
I saw an orphan crying the other day, so I asked, "Where are your parents?"
God, I love working at an orphanage :)