Chew jokes
What did the squirrel say when he chewed some saggy boobs?
Is it just me or do these taste like nuts?
What do you call two Chinese lesbians?
Two can't chew.
Dog toys are getting out of control.
My mum's dog has a round bison bone.
Looks like he was chewing on Tracy Latimer's hip or something.
What is a dog's favorite snack?
RUFFles.
What does gum in my d*ck have in common?
Both get chewed on by little kids.
Been learning Chinese...
69 is too-can-chew.
Yes, sir.
Four big guys and they grab on my thighs. Blow up my guts like the 4th of July. If they keep fuckin' my butt then I might just cry. Poop and semen sprayin' on my eyes.
He lick my dick and the cum start sprayin'. Charging up my dick I'ma go super saiyan. When he cum the fuckin' booty I don't do much playing. Then I whispered in his ear, like hey are you stayin'? He said yeah I'm not leavin'.
I guess he George Floyd, cause always leavin'. Not breathin' he chew on my dick like a baby. That's teathin' I'm fuckin' a nigga I think it's named Steven. Hawkin' f*ck him 'til he ain't walkin', dick stone-cold call him BBC. Austin It's a booty massacre when I visit him in Boston. Bought him new titties I don't care what they costin'.
Bitch, hop on the dick do a split. Shout out Lil Baby. My dick is as real as it gets, I'm not fuckin' on him if he don't have tits. I'm catchin' his balls like my name Kyle Bitz.
There's four Big guys, they're grabin' on my thighs. They blow my guts like the 4th of July. If he keep fuckin' my butt then I might cry. There's poop and semen sprayin' on my eyes.
Yes sir, that is a fact tho, take out my dick slip it in his asshole. Swinging my dick through the air like a lasso. Painted his face like Apollo Pocasso (ugh). But I'm not a very good artist, f*ck 'em all good 'til that. Nigga farted planted my seeds in his ass like a garden. The way I play with balls, you should call me James Harden.
Yeah, DigBar is elite, there's four big guys and I'm takin' their meat. I eat the boy's butt, Then I chase him with skeet. And I charge for booty, I promise DigBar Isn't cheap. And I count dudes when I sleep, not sheep, get up in my sheets. And I'm beatin' on my meat.
Bitch. We got four big guys and they grab on my thighs. And they gon' bust on my eyes.
I told my sister to make a noise and hear what she said... "Cuckoo coo chew." #Owl🦉
What hurts the most? 😹
A. Breaking up before chewing.
B. Breaking up after chewing.
Dentist: Open up, sir.
Me: So... I hate my life, my family, my sisters, my dog, my cat, and I tried to take a bath with my toaster, but my dog took it. That's why I hate my dog. And my cat died trying to chew my rope; it choked... Yea.
Dentist: I... meant your mouth... so I can clean your teeth.
Me: :O Ohhhh, my bad.
Dentist: Do you need help??
Me: Yep.
Dentist: ...
Me: ....
What goes in dry and comes out wet and has white stuff at the end?
Which train is loaded with bubble gum?
A chew-chew train.
What does a gun and gum have in common?
When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.
What does a piece of gum and a gun have in common?
You pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.
I give bubblegum to the homeless so they can chew it and still be hungry.
What has teeth but doesn't use them to chew? The answer would be a comb or a piano, but technically, if you ripped someone's teeth out and hand them to them, they have teeth but can't chew with them.
How does a train eat?
"Chew chew!"
What do you call a train that carries bubblegum?
Chew-chew train! Hee hee!
Stephen Hawking died due to the BIOS update. He shut down because the power cable got chewed.
What do you call a train with bubble gum?
A chew chew train.
Oh man, I'm depressed.