Cant jokes
White people can't say the N-word, but at least they can say, "Thanks for the warning, officer," and "Hi, Dad."
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
Why can't you go home tonight? Because you haven't got a home, it's moved.
Why can't an orphan play basketball?
Because no one will be cheering them on.
If you punch an orphan, they can't do anything; they can't tell their parents.
Roses are red, Your mum's a queer, Fucking hell, Can’t get out of first gear!
Why can’t an orphan play baseball??
They can’t hit a home run! 😂
Why can't orphans be gay?
They don't have a closet to come out of.
Why can’t Asian people play baseball?
Why?
'Cause they ate the bat!
I can't come in, because I'm too high.
Why can't orphans go to parents' evening? Because their parents left them.
Husband: Hey honey, words can’t describe how beautiful you are.
Wife: Aww, thanks.
Husband: But numbers can. 0 out of 10.
What do you call an orphan? Homeless.
What's an orphan's worst favorite movie? Home Alone.
Why can't homeless people find a home? Because they're orphans.
My sister: See you at home in about an hour.
Me: Okay.
My sister: Sister, where are you? *She looks out the window.*
Me: Sis, I'm here, can't you see me?
Sister: OMG, she's dead!
Me: Yeah, I know, but can't you see me?
"Peado van, peado van, stay away, peado van, peado van, take her away."
I can't afford food, I can't afford childcare, might as well just get the money out of her.
I know this is a really bad poem, but I'll do it anyway 'cause I have nothing else to do.
'Twas so pretty a night, with people all asleep. Everyone's dreaming of that candy apple treat, and a palace. But alas! No, it's all a dream. Even eating ice cream, it's all a dream! Why can't I have this? Why can't I have that? BUT NO! It's just hitting you like a bat. YOU JUST HAVE TO HAVE IT, you say to yourself. All for me, all for me, and et cetera. It goes on and on. But why wish for riches? You're already rich enough. If you have a device, then take my advise, if you were poor you would have spent the money on food, like honey, not something that... OF ALL THINGS IS GOOGLE!
Like I said, it's really bad. :(
Why do anions hate each other?
Because they can't handle the negativity!
What talks high pitched and can't fly?
A gay man in Iran.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t find their way home.
If you own a gun and you live in the USA, hide your gun upstairs. Biden can't get it.
Biden: *falls over on steps*