Both jokes

What’s the difference between women and condoms?

There isn’t a difference; they’re both throw aways.

A leaf and an emo are both falling from a tree.

Which one hits the ground first?

The leaf, the emo got caught by a rope.

What does McDonald's and a paedophile have in common?

They both like sticking their meat in ten-year-olds.

What do orphans and Spider-Man have in common?

They both have no way home.

What do orphans and olden day actors have in common?

Both get food thrown at them some of the time.

What do my little brother and a vagina have in common?

They both ooze blood 🩸 when punched.

What's the difference between a drill and a priest?

Nothing, they both like screwing stuff!

What do Miss Reeves and Michael Jackson have in common?

They both have a touchy feeling for kids.

That joke and paper have one thing in common: they're both tearable.

Three Europeans come to America. They all get captured by Native Americans, and they want to kill them. But the Europeans beg to have their lives spared.

The Native Americans agreed to not kill them on one condition: The Europeans must go into the forest and bring back a fruit, and they will be informed what to do with it. So the first guy comes back with a peach. The Native American says, "Shove it up your ass, if you laugh we kill you." So, he shoves the peach up his ass, and he laughs, and the Native Americans kill him.

The second guy comes back with a grape. The Native American tells him the same thing. He laughs and the Native American kills him. They both see each other in heaven and the first guy says to the second guy, "I had a peach, and peaches are fuzzy, so that's why I laughed, but you had a grape, what happened?"

The second guy says, “Oh yeah, I was doing just fine until I saw the other guy come back with a pineapple!”

What is similar about the feelings of a girl's birth daddy and her new pimp daddy?

They both worry about how she will turn out!

One weekend some distant family members that I hadn't met before came over. My cousins (who I also hadn't met before) were fighting, so I decided to separate them and place them in opposite corners of the room (thinking it would help).

My mom took me to an empty room with tears in her eyes and told me they both ended up dying.

Well, SO-RRY, but I didn't know they were conjoined twins.

What do a "transgender" woman's favorite song and his/her last online order have in common?

~they're both a dick in a box.

"Never gonna give, never gonna give (Give you up) We've known each other for so long Your heart's been aching, but You're too shy to say it Inside, we both know what's been going on We know the game and we're gonna play it I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling Gotta make you understand Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you." mucho_mango: just woke up from my dream what was that.

What do feminists and tampons have in common?

They're both stuck-up cunts.

What do fire and people have in common?

They will both eventually die out.

What's the difference between a pile of dead bodies and a computer?

I don't know, I have both!

I got up one day; my neighbor was in my house and was going to take me and my mom out. I showed my mom and my neighbor a trick. They both liked it. I asked my neighbor, "Do you know any tricks?" He said, "Yes, in matter of fact, I could tell you what your mom had for breakfast." I said, "How?" Well, my neighbor licked my mom's ass and ate her pussy out in front of me. He told me my mom had pancakes. So we were in the car; I asked my neighbor, "How did you know what my mom had pancakes for breakfast?" My neighbor said, "Well, that is what your mom made me while we were waiting for you to get up."

What does my dad have in common with Nemo?

They both can’t be found.

What do gay guys and priests have in common?

They are both gay in their own ways.