Before jokes

People often ask me what I would do for a Klondike bar. Well, I'd straight up put 5 hijackers on Flight 175 before it departed from Logan Airport at 8:14 a.m. on September 11, 2001.

I ain’t a chicken, but I ate a duck before.

"Do you know the Annoying Orange?"

"Yeah, they elected him before Biden!"

What do Middle Eastern suicide bombers say before they blow up?

I weel sho u wot da bom bom is! ALLAH!

I am a racist, and I put my milk before cereal. Well, to be honest, that was when I had milk, but one day my dad says he was going to get some... then he left.

Now when I see a black guy, I yell, "Thanks for picking the cotton to make my shirt!"

Ooh! I know a joke!

(Papyrus) What is it?

(Sans) Knock knock!

(Papyrus) Uh... who's there?

(Sans) Sans

(Papyrus) Sans who?

(Sans) SANS IS LAZY!!!!! NOW PICK UP YOUR SOCKS BEFORE I SHOVE MY SPAGHETTI INTO YOUR MOUTH!

(Papyrus)

A virgin is what I called my daughter before I took that away from her.

What is one question on a tech test you should always ask before getting down?

What in the Robot!?

You’re the type of person who would pee before a shower.

What does one gay guy say to his boyfriend before he leaves for a vacation?

"Need help packing your shit?"

You are so hairy, you starred in Donkey Kong before!

Badminton: Your breath is so bad that you have to take a mint before you go on Fortnite.

I found a place before called an orphanage, but when I was allowed in there were lots of kids, and I said, "Where's your parents? Oh yeah, you're orphans." Gosh, that was one heck of a day!

A girl and dog get dropped off at an orphanage. Why was she crying before she went in? Because the people came back for their dog!

I know where you live! I saw you before!

What was the last thing to go through Princess Diana’s head before she died?

The steering wheel.

When is Father's Day?

Nine months before Mother's Day.

I found the comments before the picture of you got reported, and yes, with all my heart, there was a picture of you in your bra! But I was on your side, so was Kenya, Prince, and Heo! And Mariah, more will be in soon!

The FitnessGramTM Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20-meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.

Level 1 Feel it One Two Three Four Five Six Seven; end of level one.

Have you ever been eight before?

You were between 7 and 9.