Basement jokes

What’s the difference between kids and drugs?

I don’t hide drugs in my basement.

Explain bear still lives in his mother's basement.

After an intense workout, I finally have the body I've always dreamed of.

It's in my basement.

What’s a rapper’s favorite part of the house?

The rhyme cellar.

I like my wine like my women:

16 and in my basement.

If being sexy were a crime, you better lock me up.

Not because I'm sexy, but because I have 5 dead children in my basement.

I was laughing my ass off when the 12-year-old child realized the door to my basement was unlocked, and he didn't need to cannibalize his two friends in a desperate attempt for survival. 🤣🤣🤣

If you were a room in my house, I’d make you the basement.

So I could put kids inside you.

You know what's the difference between my basement and Chick-fil-A?

A lot of things.

I went to visit my friend who is a stand up comedian and I asked him, "Why do you have so much art supplies, clothing fabrics, and building supplies in your basement?"

He responded with, "I don't know what it is people think I need it all for, but almost every time I perform, people tell me I need new material!"

Become an anti-furry for free KFC and dead orphans in your basement.

What's the difference between orphans and girlfriends? I don't have 100 girlfriends locked in my basement.

Why did the orphan like to jump? So they can jump off a bridge to be reunited with their parents.

1 like = 10 more orphans in my basement.

Why is September 11th the best birthday ever? No one forgets it :)

What’s the difference between orphans and cars?

I don’t have 1080 cars in my basement.

Kid: *runs down the street* HELP ME!

Officer: You OK, kid?

Me: Don't worry! He's my nephew, there was a big spider.

Officer: Oh, OK, ma'am. *walks off*

When officer leaves:

Me: *gets whip* What did I say about leaving the basement?

+1 like = 1 kid in my basement.

+1 follower = 1 kid in my Microwave.

+1 Comet.

1 like = 1 more child in my basement.

Roses are red, violets are blue, there are kids in my basement, you'll be there soon.

I put this joke so the amount of jokes will be 69. Also, I have 50 kids in my basement. I fed "Twinkies" last night.