Balance jokes

So today an old lady asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her... Hhah.

What do kids call a balanced meal?

A hamburger in each hand! XD XD XD XD

When a person asked to see her balance at a bank, they pushed him over.

One day an old woman came into the bank and asked me to check her balance... So, I pushed her over.

My job is so amazing.

Today a man asked me to check his balance, so I pushed him over. His balance isn't good.

So I went to the bank and a lady asked me to check her balance... so I pushed her over.

The twin towers were just tryna take after the leaning tower of Pisa, but they lost their balance and fucked it up.

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.

A young peasant coming from the field with his scythe on his shoulder notices an attractive young woman that was doing the laundry in a mountain stream, perched on some rocks near a waterfall.

The guy stops and leans against his scythe, fascinated by the young girl's beauty.

After minutes of watching her, she loses her balance, slips on a rock and falls all the way down, crushing her head on the white rocks.

Thoughtful, he puts his scythe back on his shoulder and walks away, saying to himself "Damn, another washing machine destroyed by limestone!"

Today at the bank, an old lady asked me to help check her balance. So I pushed her over.

I asked my friend what happened to him?

His balance shifted.

Friend: My bike doesn't have a kick stand, so it can't stand up.

Me: Nah, it's just two tired.

If you kayak with a cap on and the kayak capsizes, whether or not the cap falls off depends on the cap size.

An old lady was low on money because she had spent all of her money on clothes.

So she decided to go to the bank. She walked up to the guy at the desk. She asked if he could check her balance. He asked a few questions to the old lady, like her weight and her height. He asked her if she had done any exercise recently. She was very confused. She got angry and asked the man again to check her balance. So he stood up, walked next to her and pushed her over. He came to the conclusion that she had a low balance.

What’s the difference between my ex and a unicycle?

A unicycle can only take one person at a time.

If rape was about power, then my electric bill would be a positive balance.

An old lady in the bank told me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.