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Back Jokes

A man is dating three women and has to choose which one he'll marry. He decides to give them a test. He gives each woman a present of $5000 and watches to see what she does with the money.

The first woman does a total make-over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits to look sexy for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. The man was impressed.

The second woman goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, the man is impressed.

The third woman invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much. Obviously, the man was impressed.

The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money... Then he married the one with the biggest breasts.

Shrek once went to the movies and when he sat down he felt this slimy and sticky feeling on the chair, so he stood up and complained about his chair being dirty... until he realized that he forgot to wipe earlier... so he stopped complaining and went back to his chair and sat back down.

When someone says don't talk back to me, say, "I wasn't aware that answering a question was considered talking back."

Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies.

Why? You ask.

Because it only takes one charge to bring it back to life.

Why did the cop ask the orphan if he was home alone?

The orphan said because my parents have never come back yet because I have none.

CEO Intrepid entrepreneur born in 1964, Jeffrey, Jeffrey Bezos.

Repeat, come on Jeffrey, you can do it, pave the way, put your back into it, tell us why, show us how, look at where you came from, look at you now.

Zuckerberg and Gates and Musk, they're the anchors, can make and sick it up there with drink their blood, come on Jeff get it! Dododoododododod

READ THIS OUT LOUD:

This is this cat.

This is cat.

This is how cat.

This is to cat.

This is keep cat.

This is an cat.

This is idiot cat.

This is a busy cat.

This is for cat.

This is forty cat.

this is seconds cat.

NOW- go back and read the third word from each line from the start.