Ares jokes
There are times I miss you, that I wish I could remember where I hid your body.
I gave an orphan 5 dollars and I said, "Spend it on a candy bar." I came back 5 minutes later and he didn't have a candy bar. So I look over and I see that he has a piggy bank that has 40 dollars and I said, "Where did you get that?" He said, "For being homeless," and I said, "What are you going to spend it on?" He looked at me and said, "I'm going to pay money for a mother."
Why do dwarfs suck a cow's udder instead of being breastfed? Because they are too short.
If you're ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
When Knife tells Annoying Orange, "I'm trying something new," Annoying Orange said, "Oh no, are you having a midknife crisis?" and then Annoying Orange laughs.
Don't worry if you think your life sucks. Just remember that people are arguing over the gender of a potato head.
Why is basketball such a messy sport?
'Cause the players are always dribbling everywhere!
Mom said drugs are my enemies. God said love your enemies. What do I tell her?
Snake one: Are we venomous?
Snake two: Yep!... Why do you ask?
Snake one: Cuz I just bit my tongue!!! (Drama scene)
Hi, if you are suffering with depression and want to talk about it, please do so in the comments, and just know you are NOT alone.
Q: Who are the fastest readers? A: Twin Tower victims, they got 80 stories in ten seconds.
What are the best shooting ranges in America?
Schools.
When I went to heaven, I saw Steven Hawking standing there. I asked why he isn’t in heaven yet. He said there are stairs.
Gwen just wanted to let you know you suck like a lot, you are a loser. 🤓🤓🤓🤓🤓😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣😬😬😬😬😏😏😏😏
Orphan jokes are just hurtful, and that is all they are, so please stop.
Do you know how babies are made? The boy puts his penis in the girl's butt and goes up and down for ten minutes. Then the girl takes a pregnancy test, and if it says no, then you keep doing it until she is pregnant.
The boy will lick the girl down there, and she will put his penis in her mouth and suck it. Then he will spit on his hand and rub it on her boobs and lick/suck them.
Why do men lick girls' boobs in sex?
'Cause they are just boys.
Yo mama's teeth are so crooked, they have a British accent.
"Prince???? Where are you??? I might have to go to bed for real, but I just wish we could talk at night. Why don't we anyway? (I love you so much!)"
Girls are like numbers squared. If they're under 13, just do 'em in your head.