Are jokes

Doctor: Madam, your husband needs rest and peace, so here are some sleeping pills.

Wife: Doctor, when should I give them to him?

Doctor: They are for you!

Once I saw a girl crying and asked, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working at orphanages.

Mexican jokes and black jokes are pretty much the same.

Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I buttfucked Scooby Doo.

You can tell a lot about a woman from her ankles. If they are on your shoulders, she probably likes you.

Suicidal people are groundbreaking.

Last night I burned down an orphanage.

There was one survivor who said I would regret it. I said, "What are you gonna do, tell your parents?"

A pedophile and a little boy are walking into the woods late at night.

The little boy says, "I'm scared."

The pedophile says, "You think you're scared? I have to walk back alone!"

If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child?

These jokes are so dark they almost stole my bike.

Why are Alabamians so resentful of immigrants?

They don't want their sons and daughters to have sex with anyone other than their siblings or relatives.

My friend called me a dick earlier. I said, "You are what you eat." He then proceeded to run away from me.

The more suicidal people there are, the less suicidal people there are.

All these jokes are so offensive, Mr. Hawking just won’t stand for it.

Two friends are talking and one says, "I had a good day today, I ran into my ex." The other guy replies, "How is that good?" The friend says, "I was in my car."

How much of a homophobic heterosexual man are you? I'm so homophobic I won't suck a big dick that has ketchup on it.

After God created 24 hours of alternating darkness and light, one of the angels asked him, "What are you going to do now?"

God said, "I think I'm going to call it a day."

The twin towers are like my parents, only one came back.

Why do pedophiles never win a race?

Because they are always coming in a little behind.

A kid walks in late to class. The teacher asks him, "Why are you late?" and he replies, "I was busy throwing pebbles in the lake." Another kid walks in late to class, and the teacher asks him, "Why are you late?" and he replies, "I was busy throwing pebbles in the lake." The last kid walks in and the teacher says, "Why are you late?...and why are you wet?" and the kid says back, "Remember, my name is Pebbles!!"