ANS jokes
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
They can’t find home.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
Why do orphans always have an iPhone X or above?
So they don’t have a home button. 🤙🏼
Tell an orphan: if you got no parents, clap your hands.
The parents who left their kids on the side of the road should have thought twice and got an abortion.
An orphan is like marriage. The kid is always the reason for divorce. The kid is always the reason for his parents leaving him.
When does a kid become an orphan?
When the parents leave.
The US Navy Atlantic Fleet is closing in on the North American shores. Suddenly a blip on the radar appears and the radio starts crackling:
"Hello, please divert to 5° East to avoid collision. Thank you."
The commander starts answering:
"No, you divert 5° West to avoid collision. Over!"
"Sorry, sir, you are the one who should divert to 5° East! Over!"
"Listen to me, you asshole! We are the USS Washington, and we have an entire fleet at our disposal, and be sure we'll use all means necessary to keep ourselves safe!"
After a moment of silence, the radio crackled again:
"In case you still haven't figured out, we can't move BECAUSE THIS IS A LIGHTHOUSE!"
Your mama is so stupid, she made an appointment with Dr. Pepper.
You're so ugly your mom said, "I want an abortion."
What is an orphan's favorite store?
Home Depot.
Teacher: At the end of this ruler is an idiot.
Student: Which end?
Me: I asked an orphan where his parents were. I also said that I promised to take him to them.
Orphan: They're dead.
Me: A promise made is a promise kept.
Q. What's an orphan's favorite South Park episode?
A. The anti-Family Guy episode.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell them to clap until their parents come home.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't find home plate.
Why can't an orphan be gay? Because they don't have anyone to call "daddy."
What show does an orphan hate the most? Modern Family.
What's an orphan's least favorite game?
Baseball because they can't find home plate.
How do you make an adopted kid bleed? ... Tell him to clap until his parents come back.