And jokes

Information has been leaked from government sources. When the current lock-up ends, the holder of the nation's purse, Fishi Rucksack, will launch a new initiative.

This will be to help the struggling "personal services" industry and will be labelled, "Sleep out to Help out."

"Little John, she is fat." How? He said, "Like a pig."

Say "traffic," and replace "r" with "h." It sounds like... that thicc.

I told my therapist you are too fat and ugly to date grown men. Then she asked me, "You wanna give a judgemental reaction about that?" I said, "Okay, you smell rat pee on somebody's cock."

When they were going around giving out brains and you thought they were saying "train," so you said, "No thanks, I’ll take the next one!" 🤣

My sister said I'm stupid and I'm a baby, and I said, "Oh, I didn't know we were talking about you."

Yo mama so fat, she stand on the scale and the scale says: "I want your weight, not your phone number!"

Which two football teams played in the pirate Superbowl?

The Seahawks and the Buccaneers.

Q. What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common? A. Same middle name! 😂

Hi, how are you? Busy, busy today, and I have to...

What is the difference between a human and walk home from school and walk home?

Why can’t an orphan celebrate Father’s Day and Mother’s Day? Because they have no parents.

What is the difference between the human rights act and a dad?

Time for you to stop looking at jokes on worstjokesever.com and go to bed!

Me in my dream: What a good day! *rumble* Ooh! What was that?

I wake up and I find myself on the floor.

I approached her in the checkout line and said, "Yo baby wassup?"

She invited me in the house, and we started makin' out again.

I was at a football match, and the ball was getting closer. Then it hit me. *face palm*

What did the banana say to Ethan, Ryan, and Cooper?

"Hi!"

My sister said, "LET'S GO TO PIZZA!" So, I went to the pizza shop with her and she replied, "We really only needed the car?"