All Jokes

Stephen Hawking tried joining some music bands, but all of them rejected him... except Daft Punk.

"You need to cease, all those fat cuz u obese."

All orphans deserve to die if they don't buy KFC.

I played Clash of Clans, and when I requested troops, all I got were some Muslim wall breakers.

Yo momma's so fat, when she bought a fur coat, all animals went extinct.

A painting depicts a large turtle standing on a beach with a shotgun. In the foreground, numerous baby turtles are making their way to the ocean. In the background, two pelicans are standing on a rock formation.

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the kings horses and all the kings men, said "Fuck him, he's only an egg."

So, a man walks past a gun store and sees all the guns are half price. Then the man says, "Wow, school supplies are low this week."

I had sex with twins. Well, I think it was twins. All my rage victims look alike.

Did you know that if you die you can still be a part of family game night!

All you have to do is have your family cremate you and put you in an hour glass, and the games that use hour glasses, well, you will be a part of family game night.

Why was the Cheetah not allowed to do tests?

Because it always cheated.

I told my kids to smile with the monkeys in the open zoo.

They never got together at all.

I was drinking a martini when a waitress yelled, "Do you know CPR?"

I replied, "I know the entire alphabet!" We all laughed and laughed, well, except one person.

Being an orphan isn’t all bad.

On the bright side, all your snacks are family sized.

I love you all the way to Uranus! 🤣

I was on the Official Cristiano Ronaldo website when suddenly my Anti-Virus software showed an alert on my screen! The notification read "WARNING: FRAUD DETECTED!" I was shocked but not surprised.

Penaldo has been finished for years after all, and he often ghosts in big games.